Chapter One
Australia
Nate Carter stood on the big lawn of the house he’d spenthis teenaged years in and wondered why it no longer felt like home.It wasn’tlike he didn’t love the big ranch house, didn’t have fond memories of ridinghorses across the rambling station with his sister, Elodie, or spendingevenings with his parents watching movies.
His parents weren’t the problem.His sister was still thesame obnoxious, loving woman she’d always been.
He was the problem.
“Are you sure you want to do this?”a deep voice asked.
He turned and saw his father standing on the big wraparoundporch where he would sit with his sister, swinging and talking about what wasgoing on in their lives.
He’d been home for six months and he made excuse afterexcuse why he wouldn’t sit there with Elodie.He was busy.There was work to bedone.
He never once told her the real reason.He was scared hewould sit there and have absolutely nothing to say.
Elodie had known what she wanted to do with her life sinceshe was five years old.He was twenty-six and had no idea where his place wasin the world.
Which was why he was changing things up.“Moving to theStates or working for Big Tag?”
His father wore his normal uniform of jeans and a T-shirtand looked more like a cowboy than the soldier he’d been in his younger years.Brody Carter was a legend in the security business.He’d gone from AussieSpecial Forces to working for an international security company.He’d married awoman he’d met on what he would call an “op” but what Nate kind of thought wasreally fate.All of his life he’d looked up to this man, and Nate was soworried he was letting him down.“Both, I suppose.You know Damon would love tohave you.”
Before they’d moved back to Australia, his family had beenbased in London.Elodie barely remembered living in the place called TheGarden, but Nate did.Nate remembered growing up with Damon Knight’s kids andall the others.
“I need something new.”It was nothing less than the truth.Since he’d left the military, he’d been drifting.Nothing had been able toshake this sense of… He hesitated to use the wordennui.Ennui soundedlike something that happened to way smarter people than him.
“Are you sure you’re not following one of the Taggartgirls?”His father’s brows had risen.“Because I worry you would be making amistake, son.Tasha’s getting married and the twins… Well, I don’t know how anyman handles those twins of Tag’s.”
Nate laughed.It felt good to laugh.He’d been kind of numbfor the last couple of months.“Absolutely not.And I’m not trailing after Lou,either.There is no woman involved in this decision of mine.I’m doing this forme.”
He wasn’t going to mention he’d been thinking a lot aboutDaisy O’Donnell lately.He wouldn’t pursue her or anything.When they’d beenkids, she’d followed him around and he’d known about her crush.He hadn’tminded, though he also hadn’t touched her.It made him wonder what she was upto these days.
His father nodded and stepped down, joining him on the lawn.“I suppose my question is what you’re going to get out of the experience.Youtold me you didn’t think you wanted to work security.”
“It seems to be the only thing I’m halfway good at.”Whichwas precisely the problem.
“Ah, so you’re feeling the pressure, are you?”his fatherasked.
“Pressure?No one puts pressure on me.I come home and tellyou I’ve left SASR and Mum simply gets my old room ready and you put me on theschedule.I thought the military was going to be my career.”
His father shrugged.“There’s no pressure from me or yourmum.You want to help me around the station, I’m happy to have you.You want togo work at Mum’s clinic, she would love it.Your uncle’s business is the onlyone I’m going to ask you to stay out of, and you know damn well why.”
Because Uncle Alfi worked on the outer edges of morality.He’d been a fun guy to have around, but he could get into the wildest scrapes.“I don’t think he’s looking for a partner.”
His father snorted.“He’s always looking for a partner.Isuppose I’m just wishing you didn’t have to go so far away to find yourself.This is the pressure I’m talking about.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Ah, but I do understand you,” his father said with a sigh.“I was you, son.I was the rather normal man madly in love with a brilliantwoman who I couldn’t believe I deserved.”
His parents were some of the most solid people he’d everknown.While his friends’ folks were splitting up or taking breaks, his parentswere obnoxiously in love.
He’d never felt romantic love either.Elodie fell in and outof love so easily, and he’d never felt more than some affection for the womenhe’d been with.Friendship and good sex had been the height of hisrelationships.“I think Mum would disagree.”
“Oh, she did, and I was a stubborn arse for a long time,”his dad admitted.“I let my insecurities put you and Mum in a very badposition.This is why I talk about pressure.You have been raised aroundextraordinary women.Women who have sparks of talent they can’t deny.”
His mother was a doctor.She was driven and practicallyglowed with purpose.
