I headed to the bathroom with my heart thumping louder than my slippers.
All I wanted was a hot shower… and for the temptation in the hallway to be less fine, less familiar, and less capable of reading my soul with a three-second stare.
***
“That Bear Didn’t Want Smoke… Just Snacks”
My bladder was the one organ in my body that didn’t care about ambiance, weather, or danger. When it was time, it was time. So when I blinked awake in the middle of the night, it was clear—Pee. Now.
I sat up, squinting into the dark. Adrian snored on his side, mumbling incoherently, clearly battling an overdue payment in his dreams.
“I can give you half now and pray about the rest.”
I rolled my eyes, then slid out the bed with my bonnet lopsided like a gang member who clocked out early, and toes cold from the rude little draft whispering under the bedroom door. I stretched, cracked my back, and padded down the hall toward the bathroom. Business was handled in record time. I washed my hands, adjusted my bonnet, and was halfway to the kitchen for a midnight snack when I heard a rumble.
I froze in full Jim Carrey–in–The Mask fashion, when the cops yelled, “Freeze.” My pose was locked, breath was held, and body was stiff enough to qualify for a wax museum.
What the…
My eyebrows knitted together. I backed up slowly, then hit a light jog-walk combo back to the bedroom. Once inside, I dropped to my knees, reached under the bed, and snatched my gun. I stood, flicked the safety off, and then jabbed Adrian’s shoulder.
“Adrian! Wake up! I heard something!”
He groaned. “You heard something? Chess, go back to sleep. It’s probably Santa Claus.”
I reared my head back. “Nigga, what?! It’s the week before Christmas!”
Adrian rolled over, unbothered. “Maybe he came early. Prime delivery.”
I snatched the nearest pillow and clocked him straight across the forehead.
“Yeah, and you’re liable to meet your makerearlierthan expected if you don’t get up and help me check this damn noise!”
His eyes popped open real fast, all discombobulated. “W-What?! Jesus?! And what noise?!”
“Oh,nowyou wanna be alert? When I first said something, you were apparently in your REM cycle, talkin’ terms and interest rates, sounding like you were setting up a layaway plan for rent… with the damn dreamcatcher as your landlord.”
I held the gun up, ready.
Adrian blinked at it like it was a spider on his pillow. “You got a gun? What you plan on doing with that?!”
“We have a situation that requiresbothof our attention. And yes, I haveplenty.”
“You said that like it was a damn warning.”
“Itwas.Now come on.”
Adrian got up hastily, wearing nothing but socks and boxers, tiptoeing behind me with the caution of a man avoiding child support and accidental eye contact with his baby mama at Walmart.
I turned around with my brow lifted. “Why are youbehindme?” I grumbled.
“Hell, you got the gun!”
“Aren’tyouthe man, though?”
“Yeah… but I’m smart enough to let thewomanwith the gun go first!”
Red flag number three was loudandclear.
