I made sure to speak to Aditi every night, getting to know her better. Yesterday, I even took her on a movie date. She smiled through the evening, and I was happy to see that.
“Lost in thought?” Amyra’s voice pulls me back to reality, and I shake my head a little too quickly.
“Nothing. But, why do I feel like you’ve been complaining about me not visiting you lately?” I push out a bold statement, despite having waited hopelessly for her to show up at least once. I’ve managed to ignore her presence and avoid conversations, but I’ve failed miserably at removing her from my thoughts. It took everything in me not to check on her throughout the day, yet I still did. Just cautiously. From a distance. The urge to see her gnawed at me. Even talking to Aditi for hours felt repetitive, empty, like pretending everything was normal, but without Amyra, I felt like I was missing a piece of my heart.
I made sure Amyra was doing fine from afar and noticed she barely met Karan this past week, which relieved me, though it may be considered weird. But the news that they’ll be working together? It unsettles me more than I want to admit, and the feeling of losing her comes back.
And the biggest, stupidest question in my head is…How could I lose my best friend just because she’ll be spending more time with another guy?
“Why would I complain when I know how priorities change with time?” she murmurs, her tone dipped in sadness. I hate that she thinks I forgot her because of Aditi, when the truth is the exact opposite.
If not for my heart acting strange whenever she’s around, maybe I would’ve managed to balance both her and Aditi. But no, I chose distance to figure things out.
“Come on, Ames! You shouldn’t be the one bringing up priorities. You ignored me after joining the company. You didn’t even try to approach me last week while I was swamped with work.”
What is wrong with me?
Why am I ranting about her not stopping by my cubicle or calling me even once when I mimicked her actions too? Maybe because it feels like she slowly stopped trying, stopped caring for me.
“I didn’t know you were waiting for me to show up, Rey!” she says, guilt flickering in her voice. “I felt bad about that night… thought maybe things weren’t good between you and Aditi, so I gave you space. But today, I found out you both are fine. And I feel worse now. I’m sorry for being reckless, Rey. I promise I’ll keep our friendship alive.” Her voice cracks, and when I glance up, the sight stuns me.
Unshed tears glass her eyes, and something inside me shatters. Instinctively, I pull her close, her head pressing lightly into my chest as my arms wrap around her protectively.
“Let bygones be bygones, Ames. Let’s stop this ignoring game. Let’s just go back to how we were.” I close my eyes, soaking inthe warmth of having her in my arms again because it feels like forever since I last held her like this.
Staying distant from her has been the most foolish decision I’ve ever made, and I can’t do it anymore. Instead, I’ll learn to control my emotions and give both women in my life the attention they deserve. Yes, I’ll continue focusing on my relationship with Aditi but I won’t stop caring for Amyra as my best friend.
It shouldn’t be that hard as long as I stay grounded in reality.
“You’re right, Rey.” She finally hugs me back, her arms circling my waist, and a sharp jolt of happiness rushes through my chest. My smile falters when I realize how much I missed this calm, almost magical feeling, the one I didn’t get when I held Aditi yesterday. Being close to Aditi felt nice, but not like this.Not heart-leaping, breath-stealing joy.
Maybe time will change that. Maybe relationships grow into those feelings. I lean down to press a soft kiss to the top of her head before gently pulling away and sitting back.
“Everything is going well between me and Aditi, so don’t worry,” I reassure her.
“Now that I’ve heard it from you, I’ll be tension-free,” she replies with a small smile.
“So… you and Karan working together?” I ask, careful with my tone. She nods at me.
“Yes. Our mentors assigned us to lead the Employee Engagement Campaign for the next month.” Her calm explanation tells me how smartly both divisions were tied into a joint and meaningful purpose.
“Internal branding, I see! So, have you started on it?”
“Not yet. Maybe tomorrow or sometime this week.”
“Plan?”
“Nothing yet. We’ll start from scratch.”
“Alright. I hope you successfully complete this project, Ames. All the best.”
“You mean both Karan and me?” she asks, puzzled, and I give a firm nod even though the last thing I want is that guy hovering near her. But some things are beyond my control. And honestly, it isn’t my place to interfere and I have to work on it.
“Thank you, Rey. I actually feel like Karan and I will click well and make this work too.” Her optimism is admirable, but the words ‘click together’ send a low wave of dread through me.
I just hope their equation doesn’t turn into something I’m terrified to even imagine.
Chapter 17
