"What was that?" I asked.
"You..." His brow creased and his head began to shake from side to side. "You said you didn't want to... and I thought..." And he snarled in annoyance and turned, storming away.
"Sylis?" I hissed after him, trying to keep my voice down so it wouldn't carry.
"I slipped," he said, the excuse an obvious lie.
So I stretched my legs, catching him easily to spin him around and make him face me. "Why did youkissme?!" I demanded. "And don't walk away again. I deserve to know why you'd do that. It's... We don't...." I couldn't even figure out how to explain why it didn't feel right.
"Because the Devil got inside me, okay?" he snapped. "I want unnatural things. I have no interest in bedding a wife, but I want to kiss you. So fine. Tell the elders. Even better, shoot me so I don't have to go back!"
"No." I reached over to clasp his shoulder. "You are my friend. I don't want to kiss you. I don't want to kiss Callah because it scares her, Sylis. I don't want to consummate with her because I will never hurt her. But you? I don't want to kiss youbecause..." I stuttered, trying to find the right words. "Because you aren't beautiful and delicate. You're not soft or curvaceous, and I do like those things. I simply have no urge to destroy them."
"I'm sorry," he said. "It was a mistake."
"It was a secret," I corrected. "I'm sorry."
"Are you going to tell them I'm unnatural?" he asked.
I scoffed. "And then what? You tell them I am? Sylis, everything about this is unnatural. I mean, just look around." I gestured to the trees above us. "This is the world God created. Down there? Callah says it must be the pit of Hell. Maybe the Devil is making you suffer. I don't know, but please don't kiss me again?"
"No, I won't," he mumbled.
"And we're still friends?" I asked.
That made him laugh. "Tobias, I just did a stupid thing, and you're worried I won't be your friend?"
"Well, when I do stupid things, I usually get embarrassed, and it's easier to avoid those people. I'm hoping you won't start avoiding me, because I actually like your company. I prefer the talking type. No offense, but your lips are weird."
"Yours are nice," he said, his face turning pink, and quickly.
"Yeah?"
He nodded. "But that's... I shouldn't..."
"I think we have so many things we shouldn't be doing that it's impossible to keep track of them all." And I turned him, making him walk with me again. "But I'd like to think you're my friend, and for me, that means we forgive each other and talk about things. I mean, that's what Callah and I do, and she's my best friend."
"Thanks," he said softly. "I think - " And he shoved an arm before me, forcing me to stop.
Because there, nestled between the green and yellow leaves around us was a creature. A massive one. It had four lean legs and a tree growing from its head. The hair on its body was brown, but light, and its belly was white.
"What is it?" Sylis asked.
"I don't know," I admitted. "I thought there weren't any animals left around the compound. That's why we have to go so far for meat."
"Should I shoot it?" he asked.
"No," I said, turning him away and walking again. "If we try, the wild men will hear. We'll be blamed, and if this hunt goes bad, Gideon will make sure we're among the dead."
"I'd like to live," he said. "I don't want to get married, but I'd like to live long enough to see if time will make the arrangement agreeable."
"Yeah," I said. "If nothing else, it makes it comfortable."
I walked on for a bit, thinking that was the end of it, but there was something else I had to say to him. I shouldn't. I could say nothing and let that moment back there be forgotten between us, but this man really was one of my friends. That meant I owed him one thing: an apology.
"I'm sorry I don't want to kiss you," I said softly.
"Yeah," he agreed. "Me too. Our wives would've been happier."
