"Except Ayla," I said. "And sheisyour family, Meri."
She nodded. "So what happens if I ask someone if they like me and they don't?"
"Then you accept it and either move on or become their friend. Why?"
She wrapped her hands in her skirt, partially to dry them, but also from nerves. I could tell she was working up to something, but when she lifted those royal blue eyes of hers to mine, I never could've predicted her next words.
"Do you like me like that? Because I think I might like you like that, and I want to be your friend first the way Omden and Drozel are, but you make my heart race and - "
"Yes," I broke in before she could start talking herself in circles. "I do like you like that, Meri, but I like your friendship too, and that matters just as much."
But I heard what she'd said. I did, I just wasn't really sure how to take it. She liked me? She was into me? I made her heart race? A whimsical smile was taking over my face, and I was sure I looked like an idiot, but there was something so completely pure about the way it felt, and I wanted more of it.
"How do I know if I really do?" she asked.
"Would kissing me be disgusting?" I shrugged. "That's basically how we know, Meri. If you want to kiss and touch and be close to someone, then it's romantic. If you don't, then that's okay too."
"I..." Spinning, she reached for another plate.
I couldn't tell if she'd just cut me off, if I'd pushed her too far, or if there was some Mole fear taking over. Fuck! She'd just given me a chance to... I didn't even know what, but I was sure I'd just ruined it.
Then she mumbled, "I sometimes think about what it would be like," she said. "When the bed in the men's room squeaks, I try to imagine how it would be to kiss you."
"Meri..."
"And thinking about kissing Gideon was never like that. I wanted to be his wife because it would be respectable. I liked that he was important and I'd been chosen by a handsome and young man who was rising quickly. When he smiled, it made me feel silly..."
"Meri..." I tried again.
"You don't make me feel silly," she said, setting down her latest dish. "You make me feel breathless."
"Meri," I tried for the third time.
Finally, she looked up, so I cupped the side of her face and shifted closer. "If you pull back, I will stop. If you say no, I will stop. But if you want me to kiss you, all you have to do is close your eyes."
Her lids slipped closed and her face tilted up to mine.
That was a yes. That was the most obvious consent these Mole girls knew how to do, so I leaned in, trying to savor every second of this. Gently, so very softly, I brushed my lips across hers. One little kiss, I told myself. Just for her to see. Just for us to know if we were only friends or maybe more.
And then her mouth parted and she leaned in. A wet hand landed on my waist, pulling me closer, and that was all it took. I kissed her the way she deserved to be kissed: like she mattered. Our tongues met, swirled, and explored. Our mouths moved, caressing each others', and my pulse picked up.
Slipping my fingers into the hair along the back of her neck, I found that knot she made to hold her hair up and freed it while our mouths kept going. Kiss after kiss, this woman took as much as she gave, and I realized she wanted this as much as I did - and I refused to let it go too far.
"Meri?" I breathed, pulling back so I could see her eyes. "Do I need to stop seeing Drozel?"
"No!" she huffed.
"But what if I want to see you instead? To make our friendship... More?"
She reached up, tracing a finger down my hairline, along my scales. "We don't steal from people we care about, Lessa. Women know how to share so that everyone can be happy."
"So I can kiss you again?"
"Yeah," she breathed.
And I knew our dishes weren't going to get done. I also realized I'd underestimated this girl, because at this rate, I might actually find someone who could make me fall in love. At least one. Maybe more.
Thirty-Two
