Patty hugged me back hard before pulling away to give me a once over, her bright eyes wide. “Where have you been? What happened? Tell me everything.”
Rathal chose that moment to saunter up behind me, draping his arm across my shoulders and purred into my ear. “Are you going to introduce me to your friends, dearest? Or shall I have to beg?”
Patty’s eyes got even bigger, her mouth opening and closing.
I grinned first at her and then at Rathal, patting his hand that he’d splayed over my collarbone. “It’s a really, really long story, but um, this is Rathal… my husband.”
Stunned silence filled the air after my introduction.
“I do believe you’ve given them the surprise of a lifetime, dearest wife.”
I snickered, leaning back into him. “You know, I think you're right. Just look at her face. It's like a fish out of water, gasping for air.”
Patty’s mouth snapped shut before she burst out laughing. “Holy shit, dude. Who are you?”
Rema’s pretty face was smudged with soot and blood, but even he managed a surprised smile. “An imposter, surely. Our Callie wouldn’t joke during a fight.”
“Yeah, she’d be all ‘rules this and proper procedure that’,” Patty said, waving her hand in the air.
“Technically, the fight is over,” I said, rolling my eyes at them.
“Semantics. So? What happened?”
“Good dick,” Rathal and I said at the same time and burst out laughing when both Patty and Rema’s eyeballs looked ready to pop out of their heads and roll across the floor.
“Well fuck me blind and move the furniture! Callie found her sense of humor! Someone call the Church. It's a miracle."
Aga moved to stand on the other side of Patty, a stupid grin on his green scaled face. “Should we record this occasion for the history books? Notable Killjoy Finds Soul, More On Page Six”
I was surrounded by comedians.
“Hardy har har,” I said, before giving Rema a quick hug and peck on his cheek that had the poor shy male blushing, “I missed you too, Rema. More than I did this little pain in the ass.”
“That’s a lie. You love me the most, admit it. I bring your life joy. You’d be so sad and bored without me. Tell her, Rema. I’m the best.”
Rema held up his hands, his pale face twitching with suppressed laughter. “Don’t you two bring me into this.”
I pulled Patty into my side and led the group over to our band of cutthroats and gestured to between them.
“Fam, meet the pirates, and the Matriarch Som’ae who—no matter what Rathal says—is the leader of the pirate station Erral. Som’ae, pirates, meet Patty and Rema. Some of you already know about Aga. Now, let's go. We got places to be and people to kill.”
“We will meet you on theVengeance. We have been instructed to dock our ship inside the Mother for safe keeping so we will see you on board. I look forward to speaking to you all further,” Som’ae said, dipping her head at us before gesturing for the others to follow her to their shuttle.
“Let’s get moving,” I ordered, pulling both her and Rathal along by their arms.
Patty snapped her fingers at me. “There she is. Alright, but you’re gonna explain the sexy, well dressed Anubis later.”
“Oh, I like her.” Rathal beamed.
Patty leaned around me to give Rathal a wide eyed curious look. “Where did you get that shirt? I want one.”
Oh great. Just what we needed. Sheer shirts for Patty. She didn’t wear bras. Said they were torture devices meant to suppress womens tiddies and that nipples had to breathe.
Rema shot me a pained look and I shook my head in defeat. There was no stopping it now.
“I handmade it. I am talented in many things, but I like to think cloth making is my strongest. I also make a mean cup of coffee. Did you know I imported the finest coffee beans from Earth?”
Patty’s eyes were watery when she looked at me. “What did he just say?”
