I nudge him in the ribs with my elbow, giving a watery snort in response. "That's not what I meant, smartass."
"What did you mean, then?"
I worm my hand beneath the pair of flat pillows we've been sharing for the last three months and withdraw the slender little stick I'd purchased earlier in the day. He pauses, staring down at it in shock when I slap it into his palm.
"Is this...? Are we...?"
"Pregnant," I say. My smile wobbles, threatening to fold under pressure. It's been hard without family around to help me. I don't know if I can take it if Kase doesn't want to be a father.
Time seems to slow, pulled like taffy on a stretcher. I watch him with mounting anxiety, waiting for the snap.
He lets out a whoop and squeezes me tighter, hiking me higher onto his lap so I'm straddling his waist. He's still careful of me, avoiding my injured arm when he peppers kisses all over my face and neck. The tears I've been trying to avoid finally stream down my face. Stinking hormones. It's probably going to get worse from here, and I'm not looking forward to that part at all.
His arms close around me and he finally buries his face in my neck. I can feel him smile against my skin and fresh tears squeeze out of my eyes.
"Seriously? How far along are you?"
I shrug. "We haven't had unprotected sex since the cabin...so probably a few months. I thought the nausea was because of the pain in my arm. I guess I was wrong."
Thank God we haven't had two cents to rub together, or I might have had a drink or two. I'm already worried about the amount of painkillers I've been on.
"You aren't mad?" I check.
He pulls back to examine my face, incredulous. "Mad? Why the hell would I be mad? This is all I've ever wanted."
He lays his hand flat against my belly, as though he can feel the life budding beneath his hand.
And I know what he means. Cradled here in his arms, I feel more at home than I ever did back in South Hollens, amongst the Kings. Because I've never wanted anything more than I do Kase Cruz. Sometimes we don't get to choose who we love. Sometimes it's inevitable as soon as you've met your soulmate. I've not always been certain about my future. It was a bleak, hazy thing without Kase in my life. But now that I'm here with him, I can't imagine spending my life with anyone else.
"We need to tell our families," I murmur. "Penny is going to be pissed if we don't tell her she has a little niece or nephew coming in the next six or seven months."
"She'd murder us both," Kase says with a chuckle. "Assuming she ever finds us. Doesn't seem like the sort of announcement to make over the phone though, does it?"
I smile. "About that. I have an idea..."
* * *
I slip the ultrasound photo into the envelope, slap a stamp on it, and seal it closed.
It's a surprisingly balmy day, and I'm soaking in as many rays as I can before the return to work on Monday. I've gotten a desk job at a small law firm, answering calls for a hot-shot lawyer who's too lazy to field his own damn calls. Still, I can't complain. The hours are good, the pay is better, and it lets me sit eighty percent of the time, which I appreciate. I'm not even that far along yet and my back is beginning to hurt. I'll be looking forward to one of Kase's full body massages later tonight.
Kase stands on my left, clutching my hand tight in his as we approach the collection box on the corner. In my right are three stamped letters with no return addresses. One for Penny, another for Cruz–though Kase had objected to that one–and the last to my father. I worry how he might react to it, but it doesn’t feel right to keep the news from him.
I draw the lid open and deposit our letters inside. We can only pray that they make their way into the right hands. I do feel a little better once they drop into the interior of the blue box. It is out of our hands now.
"How do you feel?" he asks.
"A little nervous. Do you think they'll be angry with us for staying away?"
"Well I'm pretty sure your father will be fucking furious with us no matter what. He was right. He's not going to see you much or at all for a while. The fucker accusedusof stealing everything. I don't know where the hell he got that idea from. Do you?"
"No clue."
Daddy never really talked about himself. I've always assumed it was to cultivate an air of mystery and let people draw their own conclusions about him. The less someone knew you, the harder it was for them to strike effectively at your weaknesses. People like to project all their worst fears onto the ones they hate and my father let them.
Now, more than ever, I wish that I'd pushed him for more stories. That little nugget he slipped Kase while I was dying is more than I've managed to pry from him my entire life.
Kase doesn't stay preoccupied for long. His face brightens as he pulls me down the sidewalk, skirting puddles and lifting me over patches of mud. The sidewalks are still damp from the previous night's rain.
