I sat on the bed and stared at the floor for a second. I was pissed that this had all been for nothing, but there was nothing else to be done. I shrugged a shoulder. “I guess we can put this back where we found it.”
“I’ll do it,” Maddy said, putting her hand on my thigh. It looked like I was more depressed about this than she was.
“I gotta show you where. Come on.”
I led her to the closet and showed her the spot on the top shelf where I’d found the box. Maddy stepped on a plastic crate on the floor to reach the shelf. Her foot slipped, and the crate flipped onto its side. Maddy tripped but caught herself and the box she was holding.
“Shit. I almost broke my neck. What…” Maddy trailed off mid-sentence as she bent to right the crate.
“Maddy? What is it?” I leaned around her. The plastic crate had cracked under her weight and spilled its contents. There were dozens of envelopes, postcards, and letters. “What the hell is all that?” I asked.
Maddy shook her head. “I don’t know, but they’re all addressed to me.”
“Grab it. Let’s take it to the living room. There’s more room there.”
Maddy shoved everything back inside and picked up the broken crate, following me to the living room. I helped her spread the contents out on the couch and ottoman. She was right. All the letters were addressed to her. Some looked old. I grabbed what looked like the oldest letter and handed it to her. “It’s your mail. Might as well open it.”
Maddy took it from me with trembling hands. The letter had never been opened. Her parents had kept them but hadn’t even opened them? Maybe it was supposed to be a sweet gift. They’d written her letters throughout her whole life, and they’d present them as some emotional gift the day she got married or had a baby or something. That idea was a nice one, but something told me that was not what this was.
Maddy pried a finger under the seam of the envelope and tore it. The shredding sound of the paper had a strange finality to it, like we were crossing over into something we were never meant to see.
I leaned over her shoulder as she pulled the piece of folded paper out and opened it. I read along with her.
Dear Madison,
I hope you are doing so well. I bet you’re getting big. I wish I could be there for your first birthday, but things are weird right now. You wouldn’t understand, but I wanted to let you know that I love you very much. I miss you every single day. I don’t want you to ever think I gave you up because I didn’t want you. It was something I had to do to keep you safe. Your new family will make sure you have the life I couldn’t give you. I do wish I could see you. Sometimes I dream about you. I got to hold you for an entire day before my friend took you to your new mommy and daddy. I can still remember the way your sweet baby hair smelled and how soft those little cheeks and fingers were. Oh gosh, I’m crying now. I need to stop writing. Happy birthday, sweet girl. I miss you.
Love, Momma
Maddy stared at the letter in open-mouthed shock. I probably had the same look on my face. Maddy set the letter aside and grabbed a postcard at random. It had a picture of a penguin wearing a Santa hat.
Maddy! I hope you had a wonderful Christmas. I’m sure Santa brought you everything you wanted. I know you’ve probably been a very good girl all year. I love you, and I hope you’re enjoying third grade!
Maddy was openly crying when she grabbed the third envelope, almost tearing it in half in her haste to see what was inside.
Dear Maddy,
I know I can never tell you where I am, but I wish I could. I’d love for you to be able to know something about me and where I live. Anyway, I was able to make a pretty nice Thanksgiving dinner. My friend came from Europe to spend it with me. He’s always looking out for me and helping me. Do you have any friends at school? I’m sure you have tons. I love you, and I hope you had a good ninth birthday.
Love, Momma
“Why?” Maddy sobbed, covering her face with her hands. “Why did they hide these from me? She loved me and missed me. She wrote all these letters, and I never even knew.”
I put an arm around her and pulled her close, letting her cry into my shoulder as I looked down at the dozens of items that had come out of the box. So many. It looked like Maddy’s birth mother had sent a letter for every single birthday and holiday she’d missed, plus a lot more that must have been sent at random times. Moments when she missed the baby she’d given up and wanted to make contact. This confirmed my theory. Gabriella hadn’t died a few months after Maddy had been born.These letters went on for years and years. She’d survived. She might still be out there.
Once Maddy had managed to pull herself under control, we organized the letters by date. I could tell she was trying not to read the words, but I kept seeing her pause every few minutes to glance at a line here or there, and her eyes would well up again. Once we were done, we could see that the last letter had been dated the day she turned eleven years old. That one was the longest of them all.
Madison,
I’m so sorry, but this will be the last letter I send you. I’m so sorry, but I have to cut off contact with you. It’s not safe for you anymore. Part of why I’m sending this is to let you know exactly who you are. Maddy, you are descended from a long line of shifters. You know who they are. They’re the men and women who can change into animals. You might start to notice changes in yourself, but maybe not. I know you’re on medication that might keep that part hidden for a long time if we’re lucky.
You are a very important person. I’ve always known that, but something in your blood makes you even more important. It will cause a lot of bad things if anyone finds out. You’ll be different from other female wolf shifters. I need you to try to restrain yourself at all times. I know that’s hard, but you have to in order to stay safe. There are bad people who will come for you if they find out how strong you are. I’m going to do my best to protect you, and I hope one day you’ll forgive me.
All I can tell you is that you aren’t alone in this. Someone will be there to help you through it all when you find out. I’m so sorry I can’t say more. I have to disappear for your own safety. Hopefully, we can be together again one day. Watching you grow all these years has been one of the few joys I’ve had in life. Please, please, remember how much I love you.
Love, MS
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