Could he truly do this to her? Share her bed while Dawn’sface kept appearing unbidden through his mind? Did he genuinely want Alina or was he merely trying to drown out the ghost of another?
Whatever the truth was, until he uncovered it, he could not, would not, do this to the drakonian princess. She deserved far more than half-truths and haunted hearts.
He drew back, breath ragged in his throat.
Alina offered him a soft, wistful smile, as though she too, had fought her own quiet battle in the shadows of their closeness and, in some small way, was grateful for the space he gave her. A single tear slipped down her cheek.
Kai kissed it away with aching tenderness, pulling her into his arms as if the strength of his embrace might somehow banish all her demons.
‘Why are you crying?’ he whispered into her ear, still holding her close, unwilling to let her go.
Alina tensed for a moment, then seemed to remember it was Kai, and the stiffness melted from her body.
‘I met someone during my time in the Desert Kingdom and… I loved her, Kai.’ She leaned back, her brown eyes glistening, the tears that clung to them shimmering like morning dew. ‘And she was taken from me. And now… I don’t know what to do. It hurts all the time. It’s as if someone has cracked open my chest, torn out my heart, and crushed it beneath their heel. I don’t know how to go on without her. I wake each morning thinking I’ll roll over and see her lying there beside me and when I don’t, the grief crashes over me like a wave, and I can’t breathe.’
Kai pressed a kiss to her forehead, his chest aching with sorrow for the drakonian princess. Not a trace of jealousy stirred at her confession; instead, something deeper settled within him. In that moment, he understood that whatever they had sharedhad been more than lust, more than even love. It was a bond forged from fierce friendship and quiet reverence. He knew, with the certainty of stone beneath his feet, that he would remain in Alina’s life for as long as she would have him.
‘The person who took her from me… they seem to know Hagan,’ Alina said at last, her voice low.
The words struck Kai like ice water. His body stiffened.
‘How is that possible?’ he asked, a frown pulling at his brow.
‘I don’t know,’ she replied with a weary sigh. ‘But there’s something between them. And I need to face whatever darkness is festering down here in the south.’
Kai kissed her forehead once more, his fingers brushing gently over the faint trails of tears that had dried upon her cheeks like the ghost of sorrow past.
‘What we had…’ Alina slowly uncurled herself from his embrace, though she stayed near, her hands resting lightly on his arms as if reluctant to fully let go. ‘I thought, for a moment, that maybe you could take the pain away. But…’
Kai smiled softly and took her hand in his, lifting it to his lips and pressing a tender kiss to her skin. ‘Perhaps this is our fate, princess. To be companions of the heart. Friends.’
Alina returned his smile, and for the first time since his arrival, it was real, genuine, unburdened by grief. ‘Perhaps in another life, it might have been different for us. Perhaps I would have climbed onto that wyvern with you, flown to your lands, and lived that story. Perhaps somewhere out there, a version of Kai and Alina chose that path, and found their happy ending.’
‘Oh, how I envy them.’
‘I do too, Kai Blackburn,’ she whispered, lifting his hand to her lips and kissing his knuckles. ‘I do too.’
The doors to the chamber creaked open, and Mareena stepped in with Dawn a heartbeat behind her. The moment Kaisaw Dawn’s eyes narrow and her pace quicken down the steps, he knew that she had seen Alina kiss his hand. Her shoulders had drawn taut, her every movement sharpened by a silent storm. She came to a halt at the water’s edge, gaze drifting to the heap of discarded clothes, then to the two of them naked, close, too close.
Something flashed in her eyes, something fleeting and fierce, but before Kai could decipher it, Dawn turned sharply on her heel and strode away.
Without a second thought, Kai hauled himself out of the pool and ran after her, water trailing in his wake. She was already climbing the stairs, vanishing through the doors, by the time he caught up. He reached for her, fingers wrapping around her arm to pull her back to him but she recoiled with a hiss, shoving him away.
Two servants approached in the corridor beyond, their eyes widening before they respectfully averted their eyes at the sight of Kai standing bare before them.
‘Nothing happened,’ he said, the words dry and brittle on his tongue.
‘But you wanted something to happen,’ Dawn replied quietly, stepping back, her arms folding tightly around her as though to shield herself from the ache.
‘I…’
Her stare turned to ice. ‘I think you’re confused, commander. You seem to be under the impression that I give a damn where you stick your cock.’
‘Dawn—’
She fixed him with one final, frostbitten look before turning away once more. But in that final glance, brief as it was, Kai saw something buried beneath the fury and cold.
Sorrow.
