For as long as I’d known him, Travis been commitment free. He loved having fun and coming and going as he pleased. I couldn’t help but worry that he would change his mind once he realized he didn’t enjoy being tied down with a girl and a kid who wasn’t evenhis.
I really wasn’t the kind of person who believed that love healed all. I wanted to be, but in my experience…love—especially romantic love—broke you more than it healedyou.
At one point, I truly thought that my love for Richie would save him, that he’d stop doing drugs and get help. But it didn’t, and I almost lost Aiden because of my own inability to walkaway.
And here I was, considering doing the same thing again, knowing the chance of it ending and destroying me were higher than the chance we could make it work. The thought was a sobering one that made my blood run cold in myveins.
“Who?” her eyebrows shot up as she appraised me deliberately. “Spill, Becky. We’ve got two and a half hours together in this car, you damn well better believe I will pester you nonstop the whole way if youdon’t.”
Wrinkling my nose, I sighed. “Fine. It’s FWB. Are you happy? I caught the feels, but I don’t think I can be withhim.”
“Why the hell not? Does he have a crooked dick?” Katie asked. I glanced over at her, my jawslack.
“No, he does not have a crooked dick.” In fact, his dick was damn near perfect. It was thick and long, veins in all the right places, and he sure knew how to useit.
“Then what’s the problem?” she demanded, practically vibrating in her seat with excitement. She was so happy for me. For years, Katie had been trying to nudge me toward the datingscene.
“I have more issues than National Geographic andI knowit.”
“So check that shit at the door,” Katie said, waving her handdismissively.
“You know, it’sreallynot that easy,” I grumbled. If it were, I’d have already doneit.
“Maybe not,” she amended, her smile reserved. “But so long as you’re upfront with those issues, it’ll be fine. Now tell me…who isFWB?”
“I can’t tellyou.”
Katie scoffed at me. “I have some theories.” She sat back in her seat, tapping her finger against her chin. “Would you like to hearthem?”
“No.”
“At first I thought it was someone you worked with…but that can’t be right. It’s definitely somebody I know,” she continued thoughtfully. “Steve?”
“Winters? No,” I almost laughed. Out of all my brother’s friends, Steve was the enigma. He was a bit of a hermit. I could see why Katie’s first guess was him—we were similar in thatregard.
“Could it be…Travis?”
I said nothing, biting my lower lip and stealing a glance at my friend. I hated outright lying to people I cared about, but I didn’t want to confess it out loudeither.
“ItisTravis!” she exclaimed with excitement. “That explains the night at O’Riley’s. You took off right after he showedup.”
“Yeah, well,” I sighed, my breath escaping in a loudwhoosh.
“Travisis FWB?” she repeated, still absorbing that information. “When did it actuallystart?”
I drew in a deep breath, lifting my right hand off the steering wheel to lift up my water bottle and chug back a sip. My throat felt impossibly dry. “The day after my mom’sfuneral.”
“Shut the front door! So when you came over to talk to me about friends with benefits,Traviswas already your friend with benefits?” she exclaimed. She was in a state of stupefaction. In all our years of being friends, I had never truly shocked Katie. I nodded, guilty. “Please tell meeverything.”
We were driving through a section of fifty-foot tall rock cuts that were a part of the Canadian Shield. Traffic was light, given that most people were heading up to cottage country, not into the city, but I still didn’t trust that I wouldn’t start bawling my eyes out and have to pullover.
“I’ll tell you everything later, when I’m not driving. Preferably when I’m drunk,” I finallysaid.
“Fair enough,” Katie sighed, leaning back in her seat. She was quiet for several moments, watching the scenery pass by while she mulled over my confession. “So…why the secret?” she asked, and I knew she was feeling hurt I hadn’t trusted her with this newssooner.
“I was afraid of being judged, or that Brock would end up finding out and that he’d be mad aboutit.”
“Why’d you evenpickTravis if you were worried about Brock’s reaction?” Katie questioned, prying into the inner workings of mymind.
