"Doing what? I just need to?—"
"I've seen this!" I'm clinging to the doorframe like a barnacle now, probably looking absolutely insane, but I don't care. "I watched this happen with Tyler and Ethan!"
Doc blinks. "What?"
"When Ethan thought Tyler cheated!" The words are tumbling out faster than my brain can organize them. "There were pictures, fake pictures, and Tyler was broken, like completely shattered, and Ethan left, and it was awful, and then Ethan found out the pictures were fake and he came back to our car wash wearing like... basically nothing? I think it was short shorts? And he apologized, and now they're all happy and gross and in love all the time?—"
"Gavin—"
"And then!” I barrel right over him because if I stop talking, I might die. "Caleb! The guy who made the fake photos! Except he didn't know that he was breaking anyone up, and Drewmade him pledge because of it, and he moved in, and James immediately became less of a grumpy asshole, and they fake-dated over Christmas, except it was so obviously not fake at all, and then they broke up because Caleb's dad is a massive dick and?—"
I finally have to breathe.
Doc is staring at me like I've grown a second head.
"—and it's not happening." My voice cracks. "I'm in love with you, and we're going to figure this out."
Doc's mouth opens. Closes. I watch hope and fear and something like panic flash across his face in quick succession.
He's not saying anything. Why isn't he saying anything? Did I break him?
"No miscommunication is going to happen," I say, because apparently my mouth has decided to just keep going. "I'm talking to you, and you're talking to me, and we're going to be alright. I watched Tyler and Ethan break up. I watched James and Caleb break up. I'm not letting us break up over what my asshole family thinks."
A knock on the door makes us both jump.
"Gavin?" Tyler's voice, muffled through the wood. "You okay in there, buddy?"
I look at Doc. Doc looks at me.
"Yeah!" My voice comes out slightly strangled. "I'm fine!"
Am I fine? I don't know if I'm fine. Doc still hasn't said anything about the love thing.
A pause. Then Ethan's voice: "Seb? You okay?"
My heart stops. I watch Doc's face, waiting, barely breathing.
Please say you're fine. Please don't ask them to rescue you from me. Please?—
"I'm fine, Ethan," Doc says quietly.
The relief nearly buckles my knees.
"Go away!" I yell at the door. "We're communicating!"
Footsteps retreat down the hallway. The music downstairs kicks back up to full volume.
Doc lets out a long breath. "Gavin..."
"Don't." I'm still plastered to the door, still clinging to the frame. "Don't say you're saving me from losing my family. Don't say you can't be the reason I lose them. I can see it on your face, that's what you're thinking, and I need you to hear me."
His jaw tightens. "You don't understand?—"
"Then explain it to me!" I'm begging now, I can hear it in my own voice. "But nothing you've said is about not wanting to be with me. It's all about my family, and Doc, you have to listen, they're terrible people."
"They're your family."
"And you're the most amazing person I've ever met." I swallow hard. "Did you hear me say I'm in love with you?"
