Another shower helped him kick-start his body, though thankfully his brain was still sleeping, which kept him from overthinking his impending meeting with Andi. When he pulled into the driveway in front of Andi’s house, he did feel a bit nervous, but not as badly as he had feared. Andi opened the door after the third ring, looking even worse than the day before, if that was possible. The rings under his eyes were definitely black, his cheeks hollowed in as if he hadn’t eaten in days, his skin had an ashen tone George associated with the terminally sick, and his clothes were more battered than the ones George had gotten used to.
“Holy shit! I’m pretty sure you shouldn’t be up. You look like you’re one IV away from pushing up daisies!”
“A good morning to you too, asshole.” Andi stepped through the door and closed it. His tone was its usual aggressive self with a dash of extra sharpness George had learned to expect when his partner was tired. He hoped it was a sign Andi had things under control.
All of a sudden, George felt insecure. He knew about the burden Andi carried. Shouldn’t he be more supportive? Should he ask questions or just roll with it?
“I can hear you thinking from where I’m standing. If you don’t feel up to me, I can walk to the precinct. You don’t have to bother with me.”
And it was back, the vulnerability that had George itching to pull Andi into his arms and protect him from the world.
“That’s not it. I was just contemplating if it’s safe for me to ask if you’re fine or if there’s anything I can do for you. You know, without getting my head bitten off by the cranky praying mantis I’ve just woken.” He winked at Andi, who stared at him openmouthed for a moment before he broke out in hysterical laughter. George let him get it all out before he raised a brow.
“Well, what is it? Do you want to talk, kill me, or just sit in the car while I drive us to the Starbucks?”
Andi wiped his eyes, then got serious. “You know what, I actually want to talk. I’ve never been able to do this with a partner before, and I find that’s something I’d appreciate. You know, despite being cranky to the point of cannibalism and all.”
“Talking it is.” George nodded in the direction of his car. “Let’s get in.”
When they both had their seat belts on, George started the car. Andi waited until George was on the street before he started to talk. “I’m utterly exhausted. I think I slept about three hours, tops. There was just too much going on.” He leaned his head back with a deep sigh.
“Was it because of me? I might not have been clear enough yesterday. I won’t tell on you, and I won’t make things difficult for you either. You have my word.”
To George’s surprise, Andi chuckled. “You know what, that would have been the other thing keeping me from sleeping if not for the silverfish mating in the cellar and kitchen.” Andi made a face. “It doesn’t happen often, you know, all of them going at it practically at the same time, and of course they had to do it when my defenses were already low. There’s nothing like lovesick arthropods to flood my senses to the point where I want to bleach my brain.” He shuddered.
“Aren’t silverfish unsanitary? I don’t want to insult you, but perhaps you need a cleaning service? To help keep a tight ship.”
In the silence that followed, George wondered what it would take to get back on Andi’s good side. Then his partner chuckled. “Okay, I can see I have my work cut out for me. What do you know about arthropods in general?”
George shrugged, setting the turn signal to get to the Starbucks. “I’m the first to admit it’s not much. Butterflies are beautiful and come from very hungry caterpillars….” Andi snorted at the children’s book reference, just like George had hoped. “Most of them are pests, and there are a lot of them. Bees give us honey. Wasps sting. Oh, and worms are good for the garden. That’s about it. I’m a city rat.”
Amusement was clear in Andi’s expression when George parked the car in front of the Starbucks, shamelessly putting the blue flashlight he had inside for car chases on the roof to justify his use of public space as a parking lot. They went into the café, the guy behind the counter yelling “The usual?” in their direction, which they confirmed with a nod. Being a regular had its perks. As they waited, Andi returned to the topic at hand.
“Silverfish like damp, dark places, so cellars, kitchens, and bathrooms are their version of paradise. Lots of food there as well. Anyway, silverfish in your house aren’t a reason to be alarmed.Nothaving them in the house should worry you much more. It’s usually a sign your home either has an unhealthy climate, often due to renovations where people put in airtight windows, or there’s some kind of poison, in most cases asbestos, somewhere. The same goes for spiders, by the way. Yes, they can be annoying, and yes, it’s not much fun seeing the floor move when you have to take a leak at night, but it means you’re in a healthy environment.” Andi shrugged.
George just stared at him. “Please tell me the same doesn’t apply to cockroaches!”
“It doesn’t. They are truly a sign of lacking hygiene. I’d like to point out, though, that they are one of nature’s most ingenious and sturdy designs. Some scientists believe cockroaches would be the only species surviving a nuclear catastrophe.”
“Is that supposed to impress me?” George didn’t know if he should be horrified or fascinated. His mind decided on a mixture of both, giving him goose bumps all over his body while not stopping his mouth from working.
“Well, given how we react to radiation and how fragile we are, I’d say being impressed is the least you can do.”
“They’re still gross.”
“They are. Gross and sturdy and masterpieces of evolution.” Andi sounded too much like he was enjoying George’s discomfort. The announcement of their order saved George from confronting his partner. Somehow, Andi managed to beat George to the counter and paid, for the first time since they knew each other, which irritated George a bit. Getting the food was his job!
When they were back in the car, Andi already sipping on his tea, George circled back to the start of their conversation. “You said your defenses were low yesterday. Was that because of our talk, or still an aftermath of what you did to find the estate?”
“A mixture of both, actually, with physical exhaustion because of the bust thrown in for good measure.” George felt Andi’s eyes on his and risked a quick glance to his partner.
“You can tell me.”
Andi closed his eyes. George had to concentrate on the road again. “I told you thegeschenkcan’t be switched off.”
“Yes. It always works. Like….” George racked his brain for an adequate comparison. The only one he could come up with sounded a bit dramatic. “Like the sun?” He made it sound like a question.
“Yeah, like the sun.” Andi chuckled. “That’s actually a pretty good picture. The sun shines all the time, but the earth’s rotation allows for darkness. Well, my darkness comes through concentration. When I’m at my best, I can suppress the impressions to nothing more than a murmur at the back of my head. A big part of that happens automatically by now, which allows me to function in the world.”
