She stroked the gelding again, her shoulders relaxing and eyes gentle. I hadn’t been expecting her to go soft like that around the horses, but it seemed she’d moved on from calling me a wannabe cowboy and was burying herself up to her forearms in Chili Pepper’s mane.
I leaned on the post, trying not to watch her too closely. Trying not to think about how she’d looked at my mom earlier, all bright-eyed and laughing like she’d been dropped directly into a dream come true.
I didn’t care about my mom’s attention. She could have it. I justwanted her to look that happy with me.
After a few more minutes of loving on every horse that came her way, she finally glanced at me again. “I like your mom.”
A startled laugh burst out of me. “Really? She’s a lot for some folks.”
“Sure,” she admitted, smiling as the horse nudged her shoulder again. “But she’s also warm, and honest, and maybe a little bit obsessed with you.”
Great. Just what I needed, Mom imprinting on Charlotte like she’d found her next project.Still, hearing Charlotte say she liked her warmed me in a place I hadn’t known needed warming.
“All of which is just another way of saying that she’s bossy and overbearing,” I said. “She follows what she thinks of as tradition so strictly that there’s no wiggle room with her and she’s completely set in her ways.”
“So am I,” she shot back, lifting an eyebrow at me. “Before you try to deny it, remember that you willingly agreed to bring me here with you without knowing very much about me. That’s on you, Cowboy.”
I snorted. “Yeah. I guess it is.”
Nodding slowly, she moved on to Firecracker, and for a few moments, all I heard was the horse’s shifting and breathing, Charlotte’s soft little hum as she rubbed the palomino’s cheek.But since we’d ventured intomotherterritory, the thing that had been chewing at me since last night finally pushed itself out.
“What’d you mean in the truck?” I asked quietly. “About wanting to know how it felt for your mom?”
Instantly, she went still. Not cold. Just frozen, her hand dropping from the horse’s muzzle and her fingers curling slightly. When she looked at me again, there was a soft kind of sincerity in her eyes. That same brief flash of vulnerability I’d seen before but it had never lasted this long.
“She died when I was eleven,” Charlotte said quietly, her voice steady but thin around the edges. “You must’ve known that.”
“Yeah, but Jameson and I were headed for college. If I remember correctly, Alex was already there.” I shook my head. “It was something sad that happened to my friends. I guess I just didn’t think much about what it was like for you.”
Her arms folded across her chest. It didn’t look defensive, though. More like she needed a hug and was giving it to herself. Part of me wanted to pull her into my arms instead. A big part. But I doubted we were quite there in our non-relationship.
“I didn’t have her around for anything,” she murmured. “All the regular teenage girl stuff. I’m sure you know what I mean, but it’s not even just that she missed all that. She also never got to see who I became. Who I’m still becoming.”
“I’m sorry, Charlotte,” I said, my heart aching over a pain so old and yet, so fresh in her voice.
She inhaled a deep breath, straightening a little and giving her head a tiny shake. “Anyway, all I meant was that I wanted to know how she felt, being needed. Being that important to someone. Being loved in a way that doesn’t go away.”
The rawness of her words made my chest feel like it was bleeding. Like someone had stuck a feral cat between my ribsand it was tearing my insides to shreds. “I thought you were a spoiled rich girl.”
It popped out before I could filter the thought, and her head snapped toward me, her eyes wide and shiny with incredulity. “Wow. That’s fantastic. I share something like that with you?—”
“No, wait.” I held up a hand. “I mean, sure, you kind of are.”
“Trent.”
I groaned. “Shit, this is all coming out wrong, but the point is that you’re also a lot more than just that and I didn’t realize it before.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that you’re not just the spoiled little princess people seem to think you are, but I don’t think you want anyone to know that. Not really.”
She arched an eyebrow at me. “They know.”
“Do they? Do they really know how much you do for so many kids who need someone exactly like you? You volunteer like it’s your job, Charlotte. It’s not just a pastime for you or something you do when you’re bored. I’m guessing it’s because you didn’t have your mom around. Like maybe you’re trying to be that person now for someone else who needs it.”
She looked at me differently, like she was seeing past the denim, the boots, and the ranch grit, and looking straight into places people didn’t normally aim for. Finally, she nodded. “You really get it now, don’t you?”
And damn, if that didn’t make me feel ten feet tall, but I cleared my throat again, trying to knock the warmth off my face. “Yeah, well. Don’t get used to it.”
