Fuck. Run.
I hauled ass through the closest door. It led out into the breezeway between the classroom buildings. A chill wind sent a shiver through me, and I wrapped my arms around myself, wishing I’d thought to grab my coat.
The school was closed for the holidays, and classes weren’t in session. The only people on campus were working on the play. On the plus side, no one was around to see how distressed I was. On the negative side, all of the hallway doors were locked. There was nowhere for me to veer off and hide from the jerk who pretended to care about me.
Footsteps pounded down the hall behind me and I kept walking without looking over my shoulder. I didn’t want to encourage him. With any luck, someone would have left one of these doors open and I would be able give him the slip.
“Clara, can we please talk?” Luke called after me.
The cloudy sky made the breezeway dim. Dull lockers lined the walls between the hallway doors. We were all alone.
“Please, stop. Just for a second. Please.”
“What part of ‘I need space’ do you not understand?” I said.
“I didn’t know you were going to be here,” he told me. “It feels like fate.”
“I doubt it,” I said, turning to face him. “There’s nothing to say. You made everything very clear before I left New York.”
“Did I make it clear? Because you didn’t give me a chance to even speak,” he said hotly.
I flinched. Luke pulled away. He looked hurt now. I refused to let it affect me.
“Don’t follow me.” Instead of turning around, I strode past him back toward the theater. It took all my strength to walk away.
I grabbed my jacket from the seatback where I’d left it, then mumbled some lame excuse to Mrs. Fletcher and circled back to the parking lot. My shitty car was waiting for me, years older than anyone else’s vehicle in the lot, including the students’.Whatever. It might be shitty, but it was dependable, and I needed stable things in my life.
The engine didn’t start when I turned the key in the ignition. So much for stable. Stupid fucking car.
I would have punched my steering wheel but I was pretty sure it would set off the airbag. Getting smacked in the face with an inflated punching bag didn’t seem like it would improve my mood. I couldn’t imagine anything helping me calm down after the shock of seeing Luke like that.
Finally, my car started, saving me the embarrassment of having to go back inside and ask someone for help. Luke would volunteer and try saving me again. Then I would have no choice but to listen to his excuses. And I wasn’t sure I was strong enough to keep resisting him.
I drove away, blasting Christmas music. Maybe it would restore some of the holiday cheer I was missing. If not, it might drown out my swirling thoughts. My head was a snow globe and Luke had shaken it up by strutting into the theater without warning.
My plan for the day had been to spend the next few hours at play rehearsal. The performance was soon. They were puttingthe last polish on things before the big show. Now, I had nowhere I needed to be.
Going home didn’t appeal to me. I didn’t want to have to explain why I was back early with my tail between my legs. It would just lead to more pity, and I couldn’t handle any more of that. When I reached the turnoff to my parents’ neighborhood, I went left instead of right.
Maggie’s Diner was pretty empty at that time of day, halfway between noon and dinnertime. I grabbed a corner booth and sat facing away from the rest of the dining room. Eating out alone was something I generally avoided, but from the look of things, I needed to get used to flying solo.
The waitress was a young girl I didn’t recognize. I asked her for a greasy double cheeseburger with a side of tater tots. Crispy. The poor kid must have seen the despair in my eyes because she hurried away and my food came out fast.
The first bite was bliss, reminding why I would never be supermodel skinny. Because cheeseburgers existed. And the tater tots, a delicious gift from the potato gods.
The burger didn’t cure my blues but it allowed me to lose myself in one of life’s simple pleasures. No one bothered me while I devoured my feast. If anyone heard the obscene moans I was making, they had the decency not to comment on it.
I got a giant coffee to go and left feeling more capable of facing the day. My phone buzzed with a text. It was from Luke, and I barely even freaked out at all.
Luke:Fletcher asked me to be Santa again. I didn’t know you were there. I told her I had to bow out. It’s safe to go back. I won’t bother you.
It was a pleasant surprise. As I had suspected, Luke hadn’t shown up at the school looking for me. It was just the universe messing with us. Or Mrs. Fletcher.
Warmth rippled through me knowing Luke cared enough about my feelings to turn down the Santa role. I didn’t have a lot going on, and the chance to work on the school play had seemed like a great opportunity to take a baby step back into restarting my life. Luke showing up had felt like I would never be able to escape him.
I might have felt guilty for costing him the role, but I sincerely doubted Luke had really wanted the part in the first place. He had looked like he didn’t want to be there at all. If anything, I had given him a decent excuse to decline.
Still, it was nice to know I had been wrong about him. I asked for space and he was trying to give it to me. It counted for something. I wasn’t sure how much, but it wasn’t nothing.
