“Do you wanna talk about how I ended up at the auction, or do you wanna talk about our arrangement?”
I survey each of them, trying to keep my heart rate at bay.
It’s impossible.
“Arrangement?” Carter seems surprised.
“Come on, we might as well forget the small talk. We all know why I’m here.”
Carter’s face turns hard again, jaw clenched into a beautiful right angle.
“I think we should be more direct with one another and say what it is we all want. Let’s start with you.” I eye all three of them. “I’m here because you want to fuck me.”
“No.”
Carter couldn’t have said that any faster, even if he tried.
I sit forward and fold my arms over my chest. I’d be offended if he wasn’t such a fucking sleaze. “No?”
Vex and Skipper also side with me. Skipper says, “What’s the big deal, man? You slept with her once. You can do it again.”
Carter sighs. “You two can have some fun of your own. I want nothing to do with this.”
I’ve experienced some wild things in my life. My chest sinking at Carter refusing to sleep with me is one of them.
I wish I knew the reason why.
“I’m not opening that can of worms again” is all he says before sulking off to the bar.
I watch him go and wonder if the man really has come to his senses.
But then I see him smile at another woman in passing and shove that thought aside.
“What’s up with him?” I ask.
Vex’s response is vague. “I don’t know. It’s been a tough year.”
“Tough how?”
Vex flashes Skipper a look and moves on. “If Carter doesn’t want to join us in the bedroom, that’s his own loss.” He reaches out and offers me his hand.
I accept immediately, desperate to feel his skin against mine.
Skipper grabs my other free hand before I can take another sip of gin. “You don’t need that.”
“I do when I haven’t had a drink for three years.”
Saying that aloud makes me realize that maybe Skipper is right. I chose to be sober three years ago for a reason—I wanted to do what my own mother couldn’t bring herself to do, for the sake of her own child.
I put my days of drinking and hooking up behind me as soon as I realized I was pregnant with Otis, but now I find myself slipping right back into that lifestyle. If I drink too much, I not only risk going back to my old ways. I also risk oversharing.
And these men don’t need to know I have Otis.
I let go of their hands and walk over to the bar to get rid of my glass. When I return, I wrap my arms around Vex. Next thing I know, I’m planting a kiss to the side of his neck.
He stiffens. “Right now? Here?”
“Does that bother you? You were all planning to fuck me collectively anyway. What difference does it make?”
