I pull up my pacing. “That’s ridiculous.” My laugh is a little nervous. “Nobody hangs on my word.”
“You’re wrong, they do. I had a dozen girls come up to me and demand to know why you’d gone straight back into rotation when you went on this mission. Every one of them had something pressing they needed to talk to you about, because and I quote, you’re the best listener and always help them figure out what to do.”
“I never really thought about it,” I say, frowning now. “It’s difficult to focus on anything when I’m so wound up… You’re not just saying this to make me feel better, are you?”
Now it’s her turn to roll her eyes. “As if.Tell me what you need, and I’ll do my very best to make it happen—you think Lilly makes offers like that to everyone?Reality check, she doesn’t. She offered you a place working in the omega community here, on Chimera. They don’t do that for just anybody. I’m only a year younger than you, and trust me, nobody’s ever said that for me.”
I make a scoffing noise.
“We all have gifts, Esme. Mine is healing in the field, but you’ve always been so good with the younger girls.” Her expression softens. “Some of them hero worship you.”
“I think hero worship is a little strong.” Only I suppose they do make me feel welcome whenever I return. Still… Deep in the pit of my stomach, the strange flutter begins, almost like something isawakening.
The sensation doesn’t disquiet me, rather, it offers comfort unlike the ache in my chest ever since Zeb. My hand goes there, to the invisible place and the thread that tethers me to a lost hope.
There were times during the disastrous operation when I could orient myself on him through that thread.
I exhale a soft breath.
“What’s that?” Diana asks, gesturing toward me.
“What’s what?” I ask, feeling instantly guilty and not sure why.
“You just… had a strange look come over your face, and your hand was right in the center of your chest when you did it. I’ve seen mated omegas do that.”
I take my hand away immediately. “I—It’s just…” Heat washes down my spine. I swallow thickly. “I think I’m finally losing my mind. I can almost feel him sometimes. I mean, how can I possibly? It’s not like we’re mated…. I never went into heat.”
“Heat? What does heat even look like?” she says, shrugging her shoulders. “When you have enough forced heats, you don’t even get the natural ones anymore. Knocks everything out of kilter. It’s different for everyone, and besides, it can happen without all the crazy sometimes…”
“I can’t be mated to him,” I say, shaking my head. “He’s not even an alpha.” But the sensation of pulling in the center of my chest is growing stronger, almost like I’ve been ignoring it, pushing it down. And now I can’t focus on anything else. My laugh is nervous. “You’re going to think this is crazy, but I swear he’s about to walk through that door. Ridiculous, right?”
A knock sounds on the door.
We both jump.
It’s probably one of the girls coming to check…
She gives me a look that I can’t decipher, strides over, and flings the door open…. And there he is, pure masculine candy in a designer suit, his hands shoved carelessly into his pockets. Close enough for me to make a fool of myself. And oddly bashful, reminding me of the medical bay where I was high on healing and blurted out that I thought he was beautiful…
“Hey,” he says. His eyes shift from Diana with the mutinous set to her jaw, over to me and back again. “Could I have a moment with Esme?”
“A moment?!”
Her voice is sharp.
I grimace when she folds her arms. I know that tone.
“You’ve got some nerve! Just because you’ve mated her, you think you can swan in here and swan back out again. Move on buddy, unless you’re here for the epic grovel.”
My jaw is hanging slack, and I can’t begin to formulate words.
His eyebrows crawl up into his hairline before his lips curve up into a smirk. “Well, given we’re already mated, I believeI’m only claiming what’s mine. But I am, you know, open to groveling, if that’s what it takes.”
The look he levels on me sends a zap of electricity up my spine.
“Men!” Diana mutters, throwing her hands in the air. “They think all they have to do is turn up looking hot and?—”
“Diana!” I hiss.
