Is it possible to be turned on and completely fucking enraged at the same time?
Because my cock is as hard as a diamond, but my body is ready to murder anyone that touches what belongs to me.
Yes, I hear it.
How totally fucking gone I am for the one woman I can never have.
It’s unfair of me to feel this way, because ultimately, I want Lexi to be happy. More than want, in fact.
Ineedit almost as badly as I need her.
I blow out a long breath as I stare down at the two photos she’s sent so far.
Both are a little sexy but also modest and definitely appropriate for a first date, but the irrational part of me that never wants another man to look at her still thinks there’s entirely too much skin on show.
I’m a walking, talking contradiction when it comes to Lexi.
Not a single part of me dislikes other men seeing the videos she makes for them, but a man seeing her in the flesh? Enjoying her body in a way that I only want for myself? That makes me fucking murderous.
Another message comes through, and my body locks up tight the same way it always does seeing her perfection.
The black lingerie I vaguely recognize from a video she made a few weeks ago clings to her like it was made just for her, and I have no choice but to squeeze my cock, throbbing painfully beneath my zipper.
Wildcat: Option three is just for you *heart emoji*
Wildcat: *sent a photo*
Her sinful body only seems to call to me more by the day, and not for the first time, I wonder if I should walk away. Leaving Cruz high and dry would be a shitty thing to do, but defiling his sister must be worse…right?
I glance around the office and find myself alone. With all the changes in the family, people have been here a lot more than normal, but today I’m alone, and that’s the only confirmation I need before I’m pulling my cock from my pants and giving it a few rough pumps.
CJP: Fuck, Wildcat. Your body is everything.
CJP: Are you going to wear that for him?
Wildcat: No. It’s just for you today.
I groan as precum pools on my tip, and the image of painting her pouty lips fills my mind.
The number of times I’ve jacked off to Lexi has long since passed acceptable, but I can’t find it in myself to care.
It would be rude not to.
CJP: Your date is a lucky son of a bitch.
Wildcat: I don’t know about that.
CJP: I do. Any man that gets any piece of you is lucky.
I hesitate to press send, but at this point, our time like this is going to come to an end soon.
Because even if Nico Sinclair isn’t what she’s looking for, now that she’s started the process with the Mafia Matchmaker, it’s only a matter of time before they find someone that is, and the only thing I know with complete certainty is that it won’t be me.
When Cruz signed himself up, he floated the idea of me going through the process as well, but the thought of being with anyone but Lexi makes me sick to my stomach.
I’d rather spend the rest of my life alone than a minute with a woman who isn’t Lexi.
And I don’t think I could handle not matching with her. I know in my soul that she’s mine, and has been for longer than I care to admit, but the thought that some algorithm could find us as anything other than a perfect match…
