Different.
It was somehow more than physical attraction, more than the usual progression from meeting to dating to sex. This felt like we were building something, thethreeof us, something that mattered in ways I was still trying to understand.
I could still feel Debbie in my arms, the press of her fingers into my skin, the rise and fall of her chest against mine, the way her breath tickled my neck. Her tiny arms wrapped around me with the kind of complete trust that I’d never experienced before, not from friends or family or . . . anyone.
Of course I’d played with kids before—roughhoused with my friends’ children, given piggyback rides, made them laugh withsilly faces and dumb jokes that made little sense, but I’d never held a little human like that, neverbeen chosenas a safe harbor by someone so small and vulnerable, never felt the weight of another person’s dreams literally resting against my heart.
It was overwhelming in the best possible way.
A fierce protectiveness rose in my chest, mixed with tenderness and something that felt dangerously close to . . . no, I couldn’t say that word. We didn’t know each other. Well, barely knew each other. There’s no way I could feel that, not now, probably not ever. There was surely no way Theo felt it. Not for me.
And yet, I couldn’t deny my heart soaring when I thought about Debbie.
And Theo, too.
For the way he watched us, his expression soft with something that looked like hope and fear all tangled together, for the careful way he moved around us, trying not to wake her, for the trust in his eyes when he realized I wasn’t going anywhere, wasn’t going to disturb her sleep or make excuses.
Or leave.
I’d felt my heart expand against my ribs like a prisoner pressing against bars with all its strength and weight, straining toward something I was still too afraid to name, but sitting there in that warm living room, with Chinese takeout containers scattered around us and Disney credits rolling, it had felt like the most natural thing in the world.
Like everything I’d been searching for without even knowing I’d been looking.
Like family.
Like home.
I pulled up to Mrs. Chen’s house and spotted Cuddles in her usual position on the front porch, but today she wasn’t alone. Mrs. Chen sat beside her in an old wooden rocking chair, sippingwhat looked like lemonade and running her fingers absently through the dog’s thick golden fur.
The scene was so peaceful I almost hated to disturb it, but I had a package that needed delivering and a beast in need of, well, avoiding.
Over the past year, I’d made a point to chat with Mrs. Chen whenever she was out. She was a sweet lady, but loneliness hung about her like an insidious cloud. Despite her rabid pet, and the fact our chats always put me behind schedule, I’d made it my private mission to ease her burden just a bit each time we met. I guess a brittle bond had formed between us, because Mrs. Chen lit up whenever I came around. It was a beautiful thing to see.
As I approached the gate, Cuddles rose, her ears snapping to attention. A familiar growl rumbled from her chest. I hesitated, my hand hovering over the latch.
Mrs. Chen looked up and burst into laughter.
“Cuddles, knock it off,” she said firmly.
To my amazement, the dog immediately sat, her tail giving a few reluctant wags as though she was disappointed to be called off from her favorite game—though her eyes remained fixed on the intruder about to enter her domain.
“She’s all bark and no bite,” Mrs. Chen said, getting to her feet with the careful movements of someone whose joints weren’t what they used to be. “I think she just likes the attention.”
“Could’ve fooled me,” I said, opening the gate cautiously. “She’s destroyed more of my uniforms than a washing machine malfunction.”
“Maybe that’s the point. It’s hard to ignore a man who keeps showing up half dressed on the neighborhood doorstep.” Mrs. Chen’s eyes sparkled with mischief. “Or maybe I have her trained to strip the shirts off hot men who come knocking. This old woman has to get her jollies where she can, after all.”
“Mrs. Chen!”
She howled again.
Heat crept up my neck. “I don’t think Cuddles is that strategic.”
“Don’t underestimate her. She’s a very smart dog.” Mrs. Chen stepped up to the fence and accepted the package with a knowing smile. “Speaking of smart, I hear you’ve been making some good impressions lately.”
“Ma’am?”
“Theodore and little Debbie. Word travels fast in a neighborhood this size.” She leaned across the fence, draping her arms onto my side in a lazy pose with the package dangling as though she was about to drop it onto the sidewalk. She was clearly in no hurry to end this conversation. “That was a nice thing you did, bringing them dinner.”
