1
“The probability of storms ruining your photo shoot is directly proportional to how much you paid your photographer.”
—It’s science
Iris
If eye rolls burned calories, I would be so skinny.
I’ve been told I have one of those faces that can’t hide my emotions—terrible poker face. People saw exactly what I was thinking without me saying a word.
Today was no different.
Part of me thought I should just say “yes, sir” and be the better person. But where was the fun in that?
I was on the phone with a man who was trying to convince me—poorly, I might add—that climate change was actually caused by government-triggered volcanoes and secret Russian nuclear submarines. Thankfully, he couldn’t see my annoyed face right now.
I had only picked up the phone in the first place because I was waiting on two of my coworkers, who were set to accompany me on a field trip.
“Sir,” I tried to politely interrupt the man ranting in my ear.
“No, you listen here, young lady,” he snapped right back, causing my eyes to roll yet again. “If you’re gonna be responsible for telling people about the weather, you gotta understand how it works.”
While most people got their weather forecast from an app or website, the weather service had always offered people the ability to call a number and have the forecast read to them. This was really important for people who were blind, but we also had a few elderly people who liked to call for the forecast simply because that was what they were used to. However, having the phone line also meant the crazies could call. Like this guy.
“Your forecasting sucks because you aren’t taking into account that the Russian subs are warming our oceans,” the man continued to rant.
“Ooooh,” I said loudly into the phone as though I was shocked. “So that’s why I’ve been wrong all these years. Thank you so much for letting me know. Have a great day!”
My last words were said in a high-pitched, overly chipper tone before I hung up the phone.
I was the Warning Coordination Meteorologist for the National Weather Service office in Las Vegas. It was my dreamjob, and I loved it.
I still got to forecast the weather like I had at my previous job, but now I also got to head up our public awareness programs.
That was my main job for today. Doing a photo shoot and taping some PSA videos on weather safety that we could post on our website and social media channels for our partners and community to watch. Ben and Christine—two of my co-workers—were going with me to help record these segments.
Our main goal was to shoot a video about pop-up thunderstorms on Lake Echo during monsoon season. Many people didn’t realize those storms could pop up with little notice, leaving people in a sticky situation of being on the lake in a lightning storm. See…lightning and water don’t mix. You are at a much bigger risk of being struck by lightning if you are out on the water.
What Ididn’tnormally do for my job was answer the phone, but since I was waiting for Christine and Ben to grab our equipment, I decided to help Calvin, one of our other meteorologists, who was off assisting with a weather balloon launch. Normally it was a one-person job, but today was very windy, so our lead meteorologist, Leah, needed help. That meant I got stuck answering the phone.
“Didn’t your mom ever tell you that if you roll your eyes too much, they’ll get stuck in the back of your head?” Calvin said, walking back over to the desk with a smile on his face.
“No,” I responded as I leaned against his desk.
“Mine either, but I feel like if itweretrue,youwould be the one it would happen to,” he chuckled as he grabbed his drink and took a swig.
I snorted as I shook my head and started to walk away. “Let me go see if Ben and Christine are ready. Good luck if that man calls back,” I said as I walked down the hallway in search of the pair so we could all go on our field trip.
“If that man calls back while you’re gone, I’m giving him your personal email address!” Calvin yelled in warning.
I chuckled because I knew he wouldn’t actually do that…hopefully.
By noon, we were hauling our gear out to the lake, and it was already hotter than Satan’s armpit outside.
I lived in the desert, so I was used to heat, but it was only the first week of May, so it was entirely unfair to be this hot already.
I literally had sweat on my eyebrows. Super classy.
