A hanger in my closet is swaying.
Oh shoot! Do I have mice, or is it something else? Ugh.
I’ll report it to Jim after the holiday. He can bring in an exterminator to get rid of them. But how did they get to my hangers?
I decide to leave the light on and eventually fall into a restless sleep.
“Are you going to learn your lesson now, Mariah?” Silas growled in my ear as blood dripped down my back.
I needed to respond, or he’d continue to beat me with the cat-o’-nine-tails. But my tongue was thick in my mouth from holding in my screams.
“Okay, I guess you didn’t learn.”
I could imagine, in my mind’s eye, his arm pulling back.
“Silas Sir, I understand. An-And pr-promise I’ve learned my lesson.”
I was about to drop my head and let oblivion pull me over the edge when I remembered the rest.
“Father dear, I forgive you for beating me,” I said, lifting my sore, aching head to look into the eyes of the man seated across from me, where I was strapped to the whipping bench.
His eyes, almost black, were locked on me. His three-piece suit was perfectly pressed, and the chain for his pocket watch gleamed in the dim light of the room.
“Darling daughter, don’t make us punish you again.” His voice sounded evil.
I forced back the cringe threatening to escape. “I won’t, Father.” I dropped my eyes and waited until Silas unstrapped me from the bench.
Silas leaned over me, his chest rubbing against my torn back. His spit rolled down the side of my face, and I held in the vomit wanting to erupt.
“Mimi, don’t forget to thank me too.” Silas chuckled in my ear.
I closed my eyes, trying to rid the image of how turned on he was, his cock pressed into my ass.
“Thank you, Silas Sir.” I tried not to gag on the words. But I had to swallow so many times, I was sure he figured it out.
“I’ll come see you later.”
His dark promise made me yank my hand free from the strap the moment he released it, and I covered my mouth. I rose on shaky legs as I carefully pulled my white shirt over my torn flesh. I had to cover myself before leaving the room, but the thought of the material touching my skin caused me to almost cry out. I bit my tongue and pierced the already tortured flesh.
“Ms. Shields will be up to clean you before you take your shower.”
“Thank you, Father.”
I slowly walked from the room, my head bowed, just as I’d been taught. I was a lesser human than my father and Silas, and for a moment, I had forgotten that. Theypunished me for it. Women were meant to bear children and manage the home while taking whatever their husbands gave them. They were not to have minds of their own or jobs.
As soon as I could, I was getting away from there. I’d talked my father into letting me attend baking school to impress suitors. What I didn’t tell him was that it would also help me get a job so I could take care of myself and escape from him and Silas. Get away from their evil plans to marry me off to one of my father’s decrepit old friends.
I come awake, gasping for air and clutching at my chest in the dark of my room. Glancing around, I try to figure out when I turned off the light.
Why am I having that dream now? I haven’t thought about the beatings in a long time. Lessons were hard learned in my life. Maybe it’s the fact that I’m getting close to Rylan and I’m notsure what he wants from me. Or maybe it’s the fact that I feel like the walls have eyes again.
Silas would watch me all the time, even when I showered. Whenever I was home, it was the worst. I loved being at boarding school, where I finally had some privacy.
The next morning, after a fitful sleep, I open the curtains and look out at the world I live in now, compared to the one I was raised in. My father would turn his nose up at my apartment. The unkept lawn, the cracked pavement, the chipped paint. It all reflects lack of money. I have enough to find a better place, but why bother if I’m just going to have to run again?
Walking across the room, I turn on my phone and open my Spotify playlist. Lianne La Havas comes on with “Don’t Wake Me Up.” I sing along as I start making breakfast for Oly and myself.
By the time Oly wakes, she’s grumpy and doesn’t want to get ready by herself.
