Pain. It was everywhere. In his skin. His blood.
“I needed you,” she whispered. “I haveneverneeded another person like I needed you that night. And you weren’t there. It hurt tobreathe…andyou weren’t there. Because you wouldn’t answer your phone.”
He stumbled back, his knees so weak he almost couldn’t hold himself.
Footsteps sounded behind him, but he couldn’t take his eyes off Callie. She’d lost their baby, been through the absolute worst devastation, and he’d ignored her. He’d barely read her texts or listened to her voice messages because it had been too painful.Stupid.
Aspen moved past him, her arm going around Callie’s shoulders. “I’m going to take you home.”
Callie’s eyes were red-rimmed, another tear spilling over her cheek as she nodded.
“No.” He had no idea where the growl came from, but he didn’t want her to leave. He wanted her close. He had to fix this, dammit. “We need to talk about this.”
He needed to make this right, even though he had no fucking idea how. He needed her to forgive him. He needed to erase the hurt and the anger and the grief even though a part of him knew that wasn’t possible.
Aspen’s voice firmed. “I’m taking her home, Lock.”
She turned Callie away, but he grabbed her again. “I said no.” He was losing his fucking mind, and he had no idea how to regain it.
He stepped closer, but suddenly fingers wrapped around his elbow. Nylah’s fingers. Then his sister’s soft voice. “Let her go, Lock.”
He turned his head to see all four of his brothers and Liam behind him.
Jace stepped forward, giving a solemn nod. “There’ll be other days to talk.”
Lock didn’t want to let her go. He didn’t even feel capable. But bit by bit, he forced his muscles to ease. For his fingers to unwrap from her arm. Then he had to watch her walk away fromhim. The woman he loved. The woman he ached for. The woman he’d left to suffer alone.
CHAPTER 12
Lock hammered a nail into the wood, throwing so much force into it that the deck shook.
Pregnant. She’d beenpregnant. And he hadn’t known. He hadn’t been here.
Memories of her calls slipped into his mind. Of her name coming up on his phone screen. And of him shoving the phone back into his pocket every time she called.
Fuck, he hated himself. Everything hurt so much damn much. But did he even have therightto hurt? He’d made everything worse because he hadn’t handled the situation the way he should have two years ago.
Anger flared throughout his limbs, and before he could think better of it, he punched the deck. Pain laced up his arm. It wasn’t enough though.
“Fuck.”
He dropped the hammer and rose, running his fingers through his hair and looking up at the sky, as if that would give him what he was searching for. But he didn’t evenknowwhat he was searching for. Redemption? Peace? Some way of turning back the clock and changing things?
He sat on the steps and dropped his head into his hands just as a car engine sounded. He looked up to see Cody’s car. But it wasn’t Cody who climbed out. It was Nylah. Her blue eyes pierced his. She didn’t say anything as she walked up the steps and lowered beside him.
For a moment they both just sat there, a heaviness in their silence.
“Remember when we were little, and I broke my arm?”
He frowned. Whatever he’d thought she was about to say, it wasn’t that. “Yeah. You broke it at the river.”
“Yep. We were using that old rope to jump in. But when it was my turn, my fingers slipped. I put my arm out to catch myself, and when I landed, I knew something was wrong.” She shook her head. “I was a mess. Screaming. Crying. You, Cody, and Kayden got me home, but boy was Mom mad.”
“She rushed you to the hospital and barely said a word to us.”
“And you interpreted that as her blaming you, even though you were just a kid.”
“We all blamed ourselves.” Lock and his brothers had always been protective of Nylah. As her brothers, they’d seen it as their job.
