“Excuse me,” I say, abandoning Rob’s energy work session with the speed of a wife whose marriage is under siege and quicker than you can say divorce lawyer, “but that’sMYtherapeutic polyamory experiment, and he’s not available for community sharing.”
I hope that made sense, but I’m too livid to care.
I charge through the sliding doors on a rescue mission, dodging couples engaged in activities that would require awkward explanations to conventional relatives.
“Ladies,” I declare, wedging myself between Ransom and his enthusiastic admirers as if reclaiming stolen property from a pack of well-dressed wolves. “I appreciate your interest in my husband’s masculine energy, but I just spoke to Rob and we need to consult our auras before making any major chakra decisions.”
Okay, so that was a blatant lie. But honestly? He was probably one questionably lucid breath from suggesting it.
“Thank you,” Ransom breathes, grabbing my hand and pulling me close like we’re making a prison break.
We bolt for the door faster than tourists fleeing a time-share presentation, leaving behind the sounds of cosmic disappointment and therapeutic music that will probably haunt my dreams for years.
“I need a shower,” Ransom announces as we escape into the corridor, both of us panting like survivors of a particularly intense contact sport. “Several showers. And possibly therapy. The conventional kind. With licensed professionals who keep their clothes on.”
“It’s a shame about the clothes staying on, though,” I say with a wicked grin. “I have some boundaries I wouldn’t mind exploring—with you.”
“You did hear the bit about the shower.” His lips twitch with the hint of a naughty grin. “I hereby extend a formal invite.”
“Accepted. Should we shake on it or skip straight to the clause about removing clothing?”
“In a moment.” That frown returns. “What did you learn from the Zen master?” he asks as we put distance between ourselves and the suite that’s forever changed our understanding of cruise ship entertainmentoptions.
“Mark Sterling had a full affair with Lavender Voss,” I tell him. “Claudette found out not too long before booking this cruise.”
Ransom’s brows hike at the revelation.
“So, our primary suspect didn’t just have professional reasons to want Lavender dead,” Ransom says slowly as his security training overrides his recent therapeutic trauma. “She had personal, marriage-destroying, career-threatening reasons.”
“The traditional marriage counselor was living a lie,” I agree, mentally cataloging how this revelation changes everything about our case. “Her entire career is built on values her own husband was violating—with the victim.”
We walk in contemplative silence as the ship’s Valentine’s decorations suddenly seem less romantic and more like evidence of how badly love can go wrong when secrets and lies replace honest communication.
But as we approach our cabin, one thought crystallizes with terrifying clarity. If Claudette Sterling killed Lavender Voss to protect her marriage and career, she’s got nothing left to lose—and that makes her more dangerous than any swinger wielding therapeutic massage oil and cosmic justifications for adultery.
CHAPTER 24
Suddenly Hitched—What a Trip!
Hello, Trixie!
I’m a 28-year-old woman going on a Valentine’s cruise with my 65-year-old mother, and I’m worried we’ll clash over everything! She wants to attend all the cultural lectures and early bird dinners, while I’m dreaming of late-night karaoke and poolside cocktails. She keeps talking about age-appropriate activities and I keep rolling my eyes. We both want to have fun, but our definitions are worlds apart. How do we make this mother-daughter cruise work without driving each other completely insane? Also, she’s already packed enough vitamins to stock a pharmacy and keeps asking if I brought sensible shoes.
Generation Gap at Sea
Dear Generation Gap at Sea,
A mother-daughter cruise? Either you’re going to bond like never before or one of you is going overboard by day three—possibly both! But here’s the secret—this could be the best vacation ever if you embrace your differences.
SPLIT AND CONQUER: Let her hit those lectures while you explore the ship’s hidden bars. Meet up for afternoon tea and sharestories—her cultural enlightenment versus your poolside people-watching adventures.
FIND MIDDLE GROUND: Compromise on a cooking class together, try the casino (great equalizer!), or bond over making fun of the terrible karaoke singers from the safety of the back row.
SURPRISE FACTOR: Your mom might shock you by wanting to try the zip line, and you might actually enjoy that art auction. People act differently on vacation!
The vitamins and sensible shoes? She’s in full mom mode because she loves you. Let her fuss a little—and secretly, those comfortable shoes will save your feet by day four.
XOXO Trixie
