“Of course I do. I know everything that goes on.” The sly grin that follows makes it clear:of coursehe does. “So, do you want me to take you?”
A chill runs down my body, like it’s telling me something. “Uh…am I going to hate this?”
“Probably.” The corner of his mouth tips up. “Is that alright, moya lyubimoya? I will just drop her off and return.”
“Sure.” She shrugs. “But make sure she’s not alone. I don’t trust your brother.”
He snickers. “She won’t be alone. Kirill and Anton will be there.”
Emilia pops a single brow. “That’s not saying much.”
He can’t help but smirk.
“I’ll go, but not until you show me the baby’s room,” I tell her.
“It’s settled, then,” Konstantin says. “You girls have fun. I’ll be here answering my emails, and when you are ready, we will go.”
“I love you,” Emilia says as she rises, going over to kiss him.
And when she does, his entire face softens, his hand clasping the back of her head as he pins his forehead to hers. It’s intimate in a way that feels sacred, and I have to look away and give them their moment, clinging to the foolish hope that maybe someday I’ll have something that real.
“Ya teba bolshi lyublu.”
I don’t know what any of that means, but if I had to guess, he just told her he loves her too.
I sit stiffly in the front seat, the leather cold beneath me as trees whip past in the dark, nothing but shadows and sky out the window. The headlights catch on the road in sharp bursts, slicing through the silence like warnings I can’t decipher.
I don’t know where we’re going. Konstantin still hasn’t told me. And the longer he stays quiet, the more the unease builds.
Finally, just when I’m about to ask, he speaks.
“My brother,” he says, voice even but distant, “was shaped by our father. Molded, really. Like steel in fire. All of us were.”
I glance at him from the corner of my eye. He doesn’t look back. His gaze stays fixed on the road, one hand loose on the wheel, the other resting on his thigh.
“Our father was…cruel,” he continues. “In ways I won’t bore you with. Unlike me, Aleksei wanted his approval. A kind word, for him to say he was proud. But it never came. All he received was more cruelty until whatever part of him craved love died too.You see, not everyone gets over that sort of thing. It’s in you, and sometimes it is loud.”
A lump forms in my throat while my fingers twitch in my lap, a strange ache building beneath my ribs.
For the first time, I feel bad for my husband. For what he must’ve lived through. For the scars on his chest.
Did his father give him those?
“But Aleksei…” Konstantin goes on, almost contemplative. “He wants more. Even if he doesn’t know how to get it. And I think you might be the one person who could show him.”
I exhale slowly, his words sitting heavy inside me.
“My brother cares about you.” He glances over. “And just as it is for you, I’m sure this is all confusing for him. The things he feels for you. But if there’s even a chance you want a life with him, don’t give up on him. We would welcome you into this family with open arms.”
“Th-thank you.” I look out the window again, blinking away my emotions, heart ticking faster than I want to admit.
A life with Aleksei. What would that even look like?
Would it ever feel safe, or would it always feel like I’m standing on the edge of a blade, waiting for him to cut me just to see how much I’ll bleed?
“He’s stubborn,” Konstantin says with a faint smile. “Since we were kids, he always was, so you may have to give him a little extra time to come around, but he will.”
A quiet breath slips out of me, something between a laugh and a sigh. Maybe it’s amusement. Maybe it’s exhaustion. At this point, I can’t even tell the difference.
