Garin nodded. “In essence, yes,” he said. “I’ve not seen your mother, and I’m only going on what you’ve said so far. How is she around your brothers’ mates? Their children?”
I cringed. “She lost her mind when Anne tried to take their oldest back from her to feed her,” I said. “I only remember it so vividly because I happened to be there because Charles and Anne were visiting with the baby for the first time. Their son was exclusively breastfed, and Ma absolutely would not accept that. She insisted on feeding the baby.” I thought back to that weekend and remembered just how horrible the entire weekend was. “Charles and Anne ended up packing up and leaving in the middle of the night that night. They went completely no contact and have been since. Our parents don’t even know that they’ve had two other children since.”
“Does she accept your boundaries? Does she know you’re pregnant?”
“No and yes. Well, I have to assume she knows I’m pregnant. She knows I’ve met my mate. That usually happens when you meet your mate.”
“It does. I’m told it can be put off for a bit now. I’ve not really seen that personally, but most of the people that I know that are finding their mates are super excited about having a family right because they are older.”
I took several deep breaths, wondering about how I was going to deal with everything. “I feel guilty about cutting them off.”
“Why? I can understand if they were amazing parents, but it sounds as if there was certainly room for improvement. I can’t say what is wrong with your mother,” Garin said, continuing on. “But I do recommend you talking to your brothers who are no contact and asking why they completely cut off your parents. There’s most likely a reason, and it probably has a lot to do with their mates and possibly the children. I’m leaning more toward the latter.”
I nodded. “All right. I’ll message Charles and Caleb later and see what they have to say.”
“I know it’s easy for me to say because it doesn’t involve me. But there is no reason to feel guilty for how you feel. There is no guilt in cutting out relationships, even familial ones, when they do not work for your own mental health.” Garin nodded slowly. “It is my professional opinion that if you do contact your parents, you do not do so while you are still pregnant. If you should happen to, I think you should make certain Maxwell is there with you.”
“What about the guilt? How do I fix that?”
“It takes time. You have to work through your emotions, and while pregnant, it might not be the best time for that. Even if you aren’t experiencing other issues, your emotions are not going to be what they usually are. It’s part of it. You have to come toterms and accept that your mother is not necessarily a healthy relationship for you right now.”
That was difficult to hear, but deep down, I knew she was right. It was what Cameron had been saying for a while. I hadn’t really talked to Charles or Caleb recently because I didn’t want to intrude on their families. They were busy making lives for themselves with their mates. I gave Garin a fake smile. “It’s a lot,” I said. “I know what you’re saying is true. I mean, I had to mute and then block my parents’ numbers when I left. Same with their email address, but she just kept making new ones.”
Garin’s brow furrowed. “Tell me about those?”
I winced. “I wouldn’t even know where to start. Just guilt trips, mostly. How I left and abandoned her just like my brothers. How now I, her only omega child, will end up having my children away from her. She’ll never get to be a parent again, never know the love of a grandchild. Stuff like that.”
Garin’s furrowed brow turned downright irritated. “Has she always been manipulative?”
I sighed. “I guess. She doesn’t accept boundaries. She never knocked, just walked right into the room, even if it was the bathroom and we were teenagers and taking a shower. There were no locks on the doors, not that they stop a shifter anyway. She wouldn’t accept us having friends and spending time with them outside of the house. It’s just one thing after another. She’s just…a lot.”
“Can I ask, where was your father? Did he ever step in?”
I shook my head. “Not really. He was there, but he tried to be away as much as he could. He worked. Ma didn’t. He was really involved in pack things, which left us with Ma for a good part of the day. There were times when we actually wouldn’t see Dad for a few days at a time because he was gone before we got up and didn’t come home until we were already in bed. That changed some when we were teenagers and could become more involvedwith the pack, but it’s difficult when some of you are fox shifters in a wolf pack.”
Garin smiled. “That I can completely understand. My omega dad is a dragon. My sire is a vampire. I grew up in a vampire coven in the middle of a city. It was incredibly difficult to shift and fly once puberty hit. I do understand the ‘fish out of water’ situation.”
“I almost think being in a coven might have been better. We wouldn’t have been excluded from ‘pack runs.’”
“I want to see you again. Next week, if at all possible, but I know your due date is getting close.”
“Not for another almost three weeks. I have time.”
“Good. I’d like to have Maxwell with you if you don’t mind.” I shook my head. “I want you to think about specific instances where your mother overstepped. What did she do specifically? How that made you feel. How would you feel if you were in her shoes and you were doing it to your child? Please bring a few specific moments with you. Jot them down and your feelings about them, and we’ll discuss them. I’m going to say that your guilt comes from her because she’s trained you to feel that way. It’ll take time to break the cycle, but it can be done.”
“All right. Just any moments? Mine? My brothers?”
“At least one that specifically impacted you. But if there is something involving your brothers that stands out, then yes, jot that down. We’ll discuss it.”
“I can do that.”
“Good,” Garin said. “I’m not trying to rush you, but Castiel has let me know that my next appointment is here.”
I chuckled. “I get that. We spent some time with Otto. He’s adorable, by the way,” I said as we stood and started toward the door.
“Thank you. I’m completely in love with the little man. He’s so independent, and we love it, but when he’s teething, he wants one of us, usually me.”
“You’re Daddy. That’s understandable. Even at his young age, he’s going to recognize that you are the one that gave birth to him. He already knows your heartbeat; that’s why it’s soothing to him.”
