“Don’t,” he mutters almost brokenly, and I close my mouth. Giving me his back, he turns to look out over Sin City again. “I know it doesn’t matter what the two of you do,” he admits quietly. “You were right. You’re both adults and can do whatever you want.”
I don’t really know what to say. Somehow over the past month, I’ve lost my best friend, and I don’t know how to get him back. If that’s even a possibility. Over a woman of all things. I feel other factors apply as well, but this is the one thing he wants to cling to. Maybe he wanted to push me away. “You asked me if I loved her. And I didn’t get to answer you.”
He slowly turns around, his blue eyes meeting mine.
“I do,” I say, and a smile spreads across my face. “It didn’t start out that way of course. But that’s what it is now.”
He looks away, staring at the black-painted wall, and sighs heavily. “I’m pretty sure I fell in love with April the moment I saw her. But now …”
I frown as he trails off. “Now what?”
“Nothing. It doesn’t matter.” He goes to walk past me, but I reach out, grabbing his arm and stop him.
“It does matter,” I tell him. “What is it?” I want to be here for Grave. He hasn’t even given me a chance to be a good friend to him, but I want to help him.
He drops his head to stare at his feet. “It’s …” He sniffs, unable to look at me. “She kept her feelings from me. Afraid I’d turn to drugs if I knew how much pain she was in over … the baby.” His voice breaks.
I let out a long breath.
“And I hate that I can’t be what she needs.” He takes in a shaky breath. “She thought I was too fragile to handle the truth. Such a weak man, that she felt she had to hide that from me,” he chokes out.
“Hey?” I let go of his arm and grip his face, making him look up at me. Tears silently run down his cheeks. “Don’t do this to yourself, Grave. You are what she needs. Do you understand me?”
He nods and sniffs again. I pull him into me, and he hugs me. “April is lucky to have you.” I slap his back. “And she knows that.” I know she thought she was doing the right thing. There’s no manual when it comes to helping a recovering addict. They can relapse for no reason other than they just want a hit. A relationship can be a lot and then a pregnancy …miscarriage? She just wanted to protect him.
He nods, hugging me tightly before he pulls away quickly, as if our manly hug had timed out. He rushes to wipe the tears from his face and clears his throat. “I hope that Alexa is what you’ve been looking for, Cross.”
I give him a soft smile. “She is, Grave. She is.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
ALEXA
“OH MY GOD,I’m stuffed.” Jasmine sighs, leaning back in the booth.
“What are you ladies doing this Friday night?” April asks.
“Nothing.” I groan, also feeling like I ate too much. It’s my one night off this weekend from Crown. The great thing about the nightclub is that I make so much that I don’t have to work every damn day. But then a thought hits me and last night might have been my last night now that Grave and her are back. Another thing to add to my list of questions for Cross.
“I’m free. What’s up?” Emilee wonders.
“I could really use a girl’s night,” April answers. “Not a get dolled up and go out kind of girls night. But one where we wear pajamas, drink wine, and eat pie in the living room while watching a movie kind of girls night.”
“Count me in.” I raise my hand.
“Yes!” Emilee agrees. “That sounds amazing.”
“Sure.” Haven nods.
Jasmine sucks down what’s left of her mimosa. “I’ll bring vodka too.”
We get up and start to say our goodbyes. Everyone needing to get on with their day. “April, may I speak to you?” I ask nervously.
“Of course.” She says, sitting back down in the booth as the girls walk out of Empire. “Everything okay?”
I push my hair behind my ear. “I just wanted to apologize.”
“For what?” She frowns.
