Bones pushes the blade into his flesh right below his sternum, cutting the skin and dragging it downward. The guy’s muffled screams turn to outright sobbing while blood pours out and onto the table as we play operation on him, knowing we’ll be burying a body later.
_______________
IT’S A QUARTERtill three when I pull up to her bar. Hers is the only car left in the parking lot. Getting out of mine, I walk up to the back door and enter. Grinding my teeth, I’m irritated that she leaves it unlocked. That’s not fucking safe.
I walk down the long hallway and come to a stop when I see her standing behind the bar, cleaning it off with a towel, softly humming to herself. She turns and jumps, letting out a scream when she spots me. “Jesus, Cross.” Her hand goes to her chest. “What the fuck are you doing? Creeping?”
“Well, if you’d lock your door …”
“Don’t start with me.” She slaps the towel on the bar. “I’m not in the mood.” Then she disappears into the cooler.
I make my way over to the bar and sit on a stool, waiting.
“What do you want?” she asks when she returns.
“I thought I’d tell you congratulations to your face.”
She snorts. “You spoke to Bones.”
“Not exactly,” I say vaguely.
“Well, thanks. you may leave now.” She points in the direction of the back door. “You know your way out.”
I stand and am about to do as she states, but something stops me. I knock my knuckles on the bar and turn to face her once again. “Listen. I came here to apologize.”
“Apologize?” She arches a brow, crossing her arms over her chest. “For?”
“Grave ... April’s brother.” My arms go wide before dropping them to my thighs. “All of it.” I fall back down onto a barstool. “I never once tried to help Grave. Bones was so hard on him. Grave pushed him away because of that. Titan just did his own thing. But me? I enabled him. I partied with him. Did drugs with him. Covered at Kingdom for him. I didn’t know how to help him. And I didn’t want to. If I didn’t have him, then I had no one to help me bury my problem.” I slam my fist on the bar, hating that I’m admitting to her that I have my own issues. “I knew it was wrong but just didn’t seem to care.”
She looks like she wants to question that slip I just made about my problem but thinks better of it. Instead, she sighs. “I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have said anything. It’s not my place.” Reaching across the bar, she places her hand on mine. “Just like you said, he’s not that person anymore.”
“Yeah.” And I guess I’m not either. I haven’t done anything in weeks.
They helped me forget about all the bad memories of my father. My mother. How he would remind us that we live for God. I still have the scars to go along with them. So, even if I was lucky enough to forget, the reminder will forever be there. Just like he wanted. In a way, the bastard won. Even after all these years, he’s still in my head.
“Please, Mom. Make him stop,” I beg her as I lie on my stomach.
She sits next to me on my bed, rubbing cream on my burn marks as tears slowly run down the side of my cheeks to wet my pillow.
“Forgiveness must be earned,” she says softly.
“Forgiveness from what?” I ask. I haven’t done anything wrong. Not yet anyway.
“Being born,” she answers.
She makes it sound like I asked for this life. Who would want to live a life of punishment? “I didn’t…”
“Shh,” she tells me. “It won’t be like this forever, son. But power comes with a price. He’s preparing you for what’s to come.”
“I don’t want it.” I’m not even sure what she’s talking about, but I know it’s not what I want.
“A King is powerful. He rules his Kingdom. He must be able to endure the darkest of days. He must be able to conquer the biggest threat. You are too young to understand now, but one day you will see. You will find strength in the crosses that you bear.”
“Cross?”
I blink and look up to see her now standing next to my barstool.
“You okay?” She reaches out to cup my face, but I’m faster. My arm lashes out, gripping her wrists and stopping her. She sucks in a breath at the tightness of my grip. Instead of releasing her, I yank her closer to me.
