When I finally reach her locker, I actually feel like crying. “Finally,” I mutter under my breath. Never thought I’d be this relieved to see a number. With a shaky breath, I slip the money I’ve managed to scrape together through the narrow gap. It’s not much, but it’s all I have.
I swallow the lump in my throat, pushing aside the nagging ache, and set my sights on finding Naomi to give her her money. But just as I’m about to text her, she appears before me.
We lock eyes, and for a brief moment, I see a flicker of something familiar, a glimmer of something other than pure hatred for me. Me and my hopeless imagination…
“Adeline,” Naomi greets me, her tone flat.
I swallow hard. “Naomi, I… I wanted to talk to you. It’s important.”
Why am I afraid? She’s my sister.
Get it together, Adeline. Don’t be such a wimp.
Her arms cross over her chest, her expression indifferent. “Well, make it quick. I have better things to do.”
My fingers tremble as I pull the remaining money from my pocket. It’s everything I have left, a pitiful sum, but right now, it’s everything. I hold it out to her, my voice barely above a whisper. “Here. Your lunch money.”
Naomi’s eyes narrow as she takes the money, her lips curling into a sneer. “Is that it?” she scoffs. “You expect me to survive on this?”
The words cut deep, sharper than I’d expected. My heart sinks, guilt flooding through me in waves. “I’m sorry,” I whisper. “That’s all I can manage right now.”
“You always come up short, don’t you?” she sneers.
Tears sting at my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall. The guilt twists into something crueller, an unbearable ache in my chest. I wanted to do more, to shield her from all of this, but my best is never enough. Clearly. And as much as I try to keep everything together it doesn’t matter, because in everyone else’s eyes, I’m the one making it fall apart.
It’s positively annoying, and sometimes all I really want to do is yell and scream in her face and demand an apology. But instead, I choose the pathetic pathway once again. Mainly because I can’t afford to act solely on emotion.
“I’ll try harder next time,” I murmur.
“I’ll find a way. I promise.”
For a moment, something shifts in Naomi’s eyes. A flicker of guilt, maybe. But it’s gone in an instant, replaced by cold indifference. She snatches the money from my hand and walks away without another word.
But before I can take more than a few steps, a wave of dizziness crashes over me. The hallway blurs, tilting in ways it shouldn’t. And my stomach twists violently, demanding attention I can’t give it.
I stop, gripping the nearest locker for support. Trying to breathe suddenly becomes harder, like the air has suddenly gotten thicker, and everything feels so strange, distorted, as if I were viewing the world through a foggy lens.
My head spins, and my vision darkens at the edges.
Oh Jesus.
This can’t happen.
Please… please, not now.
Not again.
I can’t remember the last time I’ve eaten a proper meal. The constant gnawing hunger has become so familiar. I guess I’m just so used to giving my food away.
I’ve become an expert at hiding it. Concealing the depth of my exhaustion and the extent of my hunger.
I suppose I’m paying for it now.
My body betrays me. The world tilts again, and my knees buckle. I stumble, collapsing into the cold floor. The last thing I see before the darkness claims me is a pair of the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen, wide with confusion. Multi-coloured. Blue, grey, green… all shifting in and out of each other, and at the centre, a ring of gold circles each pupil.
Like sunlight caught in the eye of a storm.
If angels had eyes, I think they might look like this.
