Lilia shrugs, but it’s not casual. “It was.” She pauses, looking thoughtful. “I didn’t think I’d get out.”
Then, almost immediately, she laughs—a brittle, humourless sound. She presses her face into her knees for a moment before glancing at me. “You know, I don’t get to talk on this topic much.”
I hesitate. “Do you want to?” I ask gently.
Something wary and fragile flickers behind her beautiful eyes. She shrugs, though her voice doesn’t match the gesture. “I don’t think I’ll ever forget that feeling. That helplessness.”
I nod once. “Tell me about it.”
“But the bottle doesn’t care how broken you are,” she says, “it just waits for you to shatter again.”
I’m about to say something, but I realize she isn’t finished.
“And my parents… they just didn’t understand,” she says softly, staring at some invisible point in the room. “The craving was so deep it felt like it was in my blood. Screaming for just one more sip. Just one more, and everything would be fine. One more and I could breathe again.”
Her voice hitches slightly onbreath, and I don’t know if she notices. She presses her lips together, an attempt to compose herself, but her shoulders curl inward.
“Lilia… I’m so sorry. I had no idea,” I say eventually, though it feels small. Inadequate in the face of what she’s told me.
She turns her head slightly, giving me a look that’s… fond, maybe. Tired, but not unkind. Then she smiles.
“You have a frustrating tendency to apologize for things that aren’t your fault,” she says gently.
I open my mouth to respond—to saysomething, anything—but she cuts in before I can.
“It’s hard to know these things. People like to think it’s obvious, but it’s not. Most of the time, you never end up finding out.” She trails off for a second, eyes unfocused. “Most of the time, it’s the person you least expect.”
I nod, suddenly feeling something thick in my throat. “Things are rarely how they seem.”
For a few moments, I’m lost in thought until Lilia speaks again, suddenly jolly.
“I don’t know about you, but it’s starting to feelreallydepressing in here.” Lilia perks up. “Are you tired?”
I shake my head, still having a little trouble breathing after what Lilia had just told me. It seems she’s eager to move on, though.
And honestly? Maybe that would be better.
“Good.” She grins, sitting up straighter. “BecauseDivergentis calling my name.”
I blink. “Who’s that?”
Lilia’s facedrops.She stares at me, mouth slightly open, her whole body stiffening. “TheDivergentmovies?” she says slowly, in disbelief.
I stare back, unimpressed.
Her jaw drops. “Oh, you have notlived.”
“It’s just a movie,” I point out, then quickly realize the grave mistake I made. Because Lilia lets out an actual gasp, and clutches her chest, looking at me like she’s reevaluating our entire friendship.
“Tell me you’ve at least watchedThe Hunger Games.”
I shift slightly. “I can’t tell you that.”
Lilia slaps a hand over her mouth.
“Harry Potter?” she demands, voice higher pitched now, bracing herself.
I scoff, offended. “Of course I’ve watched Harry Potter. Who do you think I am?”
