“I’ll heal, and then I’ll get my ass back to work.”
What he doesn’t say is that we move in together, we get engaged, we get married, and we start our lives together. All of which I was hoping for and anticipating. He lifts his hand, sliding his fingers through the strands of my hair, gripping them tightly. He leans forward slightly, and then his lips touch mine. He doesn’t deepen the kiss, his mouth moving against mine as he speaks.
I want him. I want it all with him. I haven’t forgotten about Justin, and I haven’t forgiven him, either. I don’t know if I ever will, because looking at this man, I can’t just accept what my cousin did to him.
Goose might have, but not me. As soon as I can, I’m going to contact my cousin and speak with him. I’m not okay with the condition in which he left Goose.
GOOSE
I pass out. I’m not sure how long I sleep on the floor, but when I wake up, it’s because Cidney tugs me to my feet, and with several moans and some very loud groans, I am able to make it up to standing.
Every fucking part of my body aches. It hurts so goddamn badly. I stumble toward the bed, climbing onto it and hissing as I lie down on the mattress. Even the sheets hurt my skin. I’ve got to be beyond bruised. There are probably some cracked bones I’m dealing with, too.
Closing my eyes, I attempt to breathe. It doesn’t work out too well. Everything fucking hurts. My breaths come out in pants as sweat breaks out over my skin. I’m tired. I could fall asleep right now if my body didn’t hurt so badly. I don’t know how the fuck I’m exhausted, but I am.
I can’t remember the last time I was beaten so fucking badly. Maybe when I was a punk-ass kid doing shit I wasn’t supposed to be doing, saying some fly shit, but Maverick always had my back, and I was never fucked up too badly. He couldn’t have my back yesterday, though.
I know I’m completely fucked up, because I don’t even open my eyes to watch Cidney change into her pajamas. I don’t have the energy for that. I am completely exhausted, with every fucking inch of my body aching.
When I feel the bed dip as she climbs onto the mattress beside me, I bite back the moan. It’s there, right fucking there.
“I can tell by the way you’re holding your body that you aren’t asleep. Do you need anything from me?”
Her words are sweet, but they’re like a stab to the gut. I need a lot of shit right now, but none of it I can have. I need Ivy not to fucking hate me. I need Cidney to be mine. I need my brothers.
“Everything’s fucked up,” I state.
Those words are met with silence.
I’m not sure how long we lie there, neither of us speaking. I start to doze off or pass out when I hear her voice.
“What does that mean?” she asks softly.
I don’t speak immediately, unsure if I should tell her what the fuck this means. Because the outcome wasn’t what I wanted. Sure, Ivy brought me back here and dumped me, but that doesn’t mean he’s cool with this, because he’s not.
I figured once we went to blows, that he would be cool and let me claim Cidney as mine. The exact opposite happened, and I’m finding it difficult to tell her that Ivy doesn’t want us together. He doesn’t want us together so badly that he’s not only told me but made an announcement to the entirety of the club.
If I sayfuck itand am with her anyway, I could lose my position in the Vicious Reapers. I could lose my family, and I could lose my life. Cidney would lose her family, too, because Ivy won’t accept it. He just fucking won’t.
I never imagined that this was going to be the outcome. I couldn’t have guessed it. He didn’t seem too pissed about us when he was here, so I don’t know what changed, but it’s clear that he is not going to let this happen, and without his consent, there can’t be anus. As much as I want there to be, as deeply as I’ve fallen for her, Cidney can’t be mine.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
GOOSE
I feign sleepas Cidney moves around the apartment. I don’t know how much longer I can pretend to sleep. It’s been two days since I went to the clubhouse and got my ass handed to me by Ivy.
Maverick came by here yesterday, and I pretended to be asleep then, too. I know I’m avoiding everyone and everything, but I don’t want to talk about the fact that I can’t keep Cidney, and I don’t want to tell her, either.
So sleep it is, even if it’s fake.
“Trent,” she calls out, and my heart squeezes.
I grunt, trying to sound like I’m just waking up, or rather that she’s woken me up. Opening one eye, I see her standing in the doorway of the bedroom. She is up and dressed, actually dressed really nicely, like she’s going to work at the law office, but I know that can’t be the case.
“I’m heading out for a couple of hours. Is there anything you need?”
Clearing my throat, I speak, and it sounds raspy as fuck, mainly because I haven’t actually spoken a word in a few days. “No, baby. I’m good.”
