I needed to move, to find a way to erase the evil I’d just seen while asleep and to ensure my shit didn’t affect the beautiful woman sitting next to me, her face etched with worry. I couldn’t be her burden; she didn’t deserve that.
As I moved to get out of bed, without a word, the scent of daisies and our lovemaking swirled around me. It was a powerful reminder of the woman I loved and our first time together. I desperately tried to cling to that smell, along with the image of Patience’s stunningly pretty face; they had the ability to right the wrongs I’d dreamed of.
Padding into the bathroom, guilt plagued me with every step for walking away from my wife. This was not how we were supposed to wake up after making love. I just couldn’t find a way to express myself after the nightmare or tell her that she was in it.
I flipped on the shower and then paused. Did I reallywant to wash away the smell of her? Would it be so wrong to let her scent linger on my skin, the reminder of her, soothing me like a balm to my tormented heart and soul?
Rubbing my hands over my face, I thought to myself that I might truly be losing my mind. I walked the rest of the way to the toilet and relieved myself before turning to get into the shower.
There she was—gloriously naked as the day she was born, more beautiful than ever and walking straight toward me. When she reached me, she wrapped her arms around my middle and rested her head on my chest.
Just the feel of her against me had me settling. It wasn’t sexual; it was about nurturing and the power of healing—something only she could do for me.
“You don’t have to tell me things if you don’t want to or can’t,” she mumbled against my chest, her warm breath ghosting across my skin. “But please don’t shut me out completely again. I can’t lose you.”
Hot moisture struck my chest, and I realized she was crying.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
I’d hurt her, worried her, and messed upagain.That felt worse than the damn horrendous dream.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart.” I kissed the top of her head. “I wasn’t leaving you; I just needed a moment to pull myself together. I don’t want my ugly shit to bleed into your life.”
She pulled her head back, dropping her arms, and looked up at me, a few tears still shimmering in her eyes. “So if I were struggling with the assault or what is happening with Chaz, I shouldn’t lean on you or expect you to be there for me?”
I opened my mouth to say something, but she stopped me cold.
“No.” Shaking her head, she placed her finger over mylips. “You don’t get to say it’s different. We have always been there for one another, and we’re not stopping now—no matter what the hell it is.” She moved her finger to my chest and gave it a quick poke. “I don’t give a shit what it is, you hear me?”
God, she was radiant, especially when she had a bone to pick with me. I couldn’t contain the smirk at her tongue-lashing, especially with the cuss words since she rarely used them because of Griffin. My wife could be a bit innocent most of the time—with her girl-next-door vibe.
Although maybe not so innocent in bed.
Now, new images emerged in my head, and I couldn’t help the other reaction happening with my body. Patience looked down, then back up at me with wide eyes.
“Really?”
I shrugged. “What can I say? You’re sexy as hell, babe. Especially when you lay into me.”
She huffed and stomped her foot, pointing at me. “This doesn’t mean you forget what I just said. We’re a team. But…”
I raised my brow as she bit her lip and paused, staring at me.
“Let’s shower, and we can have another first,” she told me as she grabbed my hand and pulled me into the hot spray. “I heard shower sex can be fun, among other things.”
“Other things?” I questioned.
My wife didn’t answer, but when she dropped to her knees in front of me and wrapped her hand around my erection, I was already liking those other things—immensely.Both my hands went to her head, and I threaded my fingers in her hair, softly gripping it.
“Baby, I need to tell you?—”
Her tongue darted out and circled the tip of my cock before her full lips wrapped around it, sucking me into her hot mouth. I lost the ability to form words, let alone think.My head fell back, my eyes closed, and a deep groan rumbled from the depths of my chest.
We’d have to circle back to the conversation we were having since it was obviously not going to happen right then, when I was two seconds from coming as she worked me over with a talent I didn’t know she possessed.
As much as I would love to let go, I found myself wanting to be inside her again—the other we’d save for another time. I pulled back on her head slightly, and she popped off me.
“What are you doing?”
