I was in love with Gemma.
Right then, I couldn’t help but think back to the previous few weeks and how we’d shared so much of our pasts, along with our fears. She’d let me talk about my deceased wife and our time together. In fact, she encouraged me to. One night while lying in bed she’d said to me, “Don’t ever be afraid to talk about Isabelle. I know you’ll always love her. I wouldn’t expect anything less knowing the amazing man you are.”
That night, as we lay in bed after our date, she turned in my arms so she was facing me. Tossing her leg over mine and wrapping her arm over my waist, she tightly curled her body into mine.
Overwhelming emotions threatened to drag me under as if a tidal wave had slammed into me. I felt my throat clog and tears trickled down my face. Finding Gemma was like finding the perfect gem. Only she was even more precious and rare than anything you could imagine.
Gemma saved me.
I swallowed around the lump in my throat, needing to give her the words I was feeling. She deserved them and so much more.
“I’m feeling a lot right now. But it’s not just my body that feels you wrapped around me, it’s my heart too.”
She looked up at me, her eyes shimmering with tears as well. “I feel you too,” she whispered. Then she kissed my bare chest over my heart and snuggled in closer, falling fast asleep just minutes later.
We’d fallen asleep tangled in each other's arms many nights and I couldn’t picture it any other way. That was another sure sign of how I felt for her.
I would say a huge part of me knew that night, maybe even before that I was in love, but I still struggled to admit it out of fear. But the way she cared about my children and wanted their mother alive in their minds and never forgetting Isabelle had love bursting through me so hard it became impossible to deny it any longer.
When the lady at the jewelry counter handed the bag over to my Gemma, I swear I felt a brush of air sweep over me and a whisper in my ears that sounded like my late wife’s voice. A tiny smile graced my lips.
I’m glad you approve, Isabelle.
After that eye-opening experience, we’d continued with our day and I had more fun shopping with Gemma than I’d had in a long time.
Who would have thought?
I should have known though.
Because whenever Gemma was with me, everything was better.
* * *
My palms were sweating.
Who would have thought I’d be nervous at my age? But having only been with one person in my lifetime, being with Gemma almost felt like the first. One, because it had been so long and two, because it was with her. She made me feel younger and everything felt new.
I knew she was scared too because she’d never been with anyone. That was another thing we talked about while lying in bed late at night. Gemma had been saving herself for the right person.
Remembering those words had me sucking in a breath.
She thought I was the one and that fact had my heart thumping with even more love. But it also had me frightened that I was going to be the one that would hurt her. And that is the last thing I ever wanted to do.
Looking down at where I’d tossed her onto the bed, worried or not, I still itched to touch every inch of her. Gemma gazed up at me with a mix of desire and apprehension. I made it my mission to make her first time the best that it could be.
Leaning over, I grabbed her ankles and slid her to the edge of the bed so her legs were dangling over. Then I dropped to the floor on my knees. She looked down at me with hooded eyes and curiosity.
“I don’t want to ever hurt you, but it will be impossible this first time,” I told her. My jaw tightened thinking about it again.
“Bodie, I may have never done this before, but I am aware of how it works.” Her cheeks flushed a pretty shade of pink. “I know it’ll hurt, but I also know that’s not your fault. I believe you will do everything you can to make sure there is as little pain as possible. I trust you.”
At her words, my pounding heart swelled.
Gemma trusting me made me feel like I’d won a prize.
Reaching up to the top of the black leggings she had on, I pulled the waistband toward her feet, drawing them and her silky white panties down her smooth, toned legs. This left her bottom half bare since she’d taken her shoes and socks off by the door when we’d come in.
Grabbing one of her feet in my hand, I kissed the side of the arch and she squirmed and giggled.
