Cujo knew what pride could do to someone.“Maybe I can talk to her.See if she’ll let me help.Hell, I’ll even let her pay interest if it makes her feel better about accepting it.”
Trent shook his head.“I doubt it, man.Anyway, she starts work shortly so you won’t get her ’til morning.”
“Morning?José’s closes at eight, right?”
“What the hell is going on between you two?She started a second job at a hotel a week ago, night beverages service.She’s working five nights a week.She didn’t tell you?”Trent looked as confused as Cujo felt.
His admiration for her grew.Refusing help she saw as charity was foolish, but he got where she was coming from.She was independent and strong.Capable.And so damn gorgeous he wanted to throw her down on the sofa.But he’d accused her of going on a date.He hadn’t listened to her.He was a fucking dumbass.
“Drea and I… we—” he shook his head.“Christ, I can’t do this.I’m not going to get into a relationship with her, Trent.It’s not fair to her.”
“Is that all that’s holding you back?Dude, I’ve never agreed with your logic.Don’t you think you can explain it to her?”
Cujo looked at his friend.The guy who’d been there with him every miserable step of the way.
“I was awake before you guys realized.I remember you falling fucking apart at the side of the bed, hoping the surgery worked, talking about how much I—” he stopped talking as his eyes started to burn.It started with fucking cupcakes and ends with tears.He was officially a pussy.
“Cuj, man.”Trent walked toward him and squeezed his shoulder.
“And this shit with Mom.”Cujo sighed.“I had a fight with Dad last night.Mom’s been back in our lives less than a week, and we’re already arguing.”
“What do you need, bro?You wanna take some time off?”
“No,” he said sharply, “that’s the last thing I fucking need.This is the only place that feels sane right now.”
“Wanna take a road trip?We could call some of the guys, see if any of them want a busman’s holiday here.Run the shop for us a few days.They’d pitch in.”
That right there was why they remained best friends.They’d dragged each other through some of the worst moments of their lives.
“What’s really going on?”Trent asked.
“I think she wants kids, man.”He looked at his friend, could see the concern etched in his eyes.“Drea, that is.She never said as much, but I was at the beach with A and Z.The way she was with them… she was a natural.The girls adored her.For a moment I could see what it would be like to have a family with her, and it didn’t scare the shit out of me.”
“I hate to quote that stupid fucking song, but isn’t it time to let it go.Your reasons don’t make sense anymore.You could have kids if you wanted to.You can adopt.Things change, man.You’vechanged.”
But the truth hadn’t.She deserved to have her own kids, and he couldn’t ask her to compromise on something so important.
***
“Keep talking… Brody.”Watching his mom struggle against the wires holding her jaw closed wrung him out.There was a rough edge to her voice.
Sunday morning and he should be at Mo’s helping set up for the party.Instead, he was at the hospital demanding answers, but it was clear they’d have to wait.The damage to his mom’s larynx was too severe for her to say more than a few words at a time, and even though he was mad as hell, he wasn’t so cruel he’d make her talk.It sounded like she was chewing on glass.
He’d come to the hospital with some fucked-up plan of trying to get to know her.He’d read up on amnesia, understood it better.It wasn’t like she was trying to hide the truth.It was just locked somewhere she couldn’t access.
The remorse he felt for arguing with his dad weighed heavily on his decision to come this morning.Cujo’s only memories of his mom were those of a child.He didn’t know her as a woman.His memories so distant and faded they were like ink drops in water.He wanted to take the chance he’d been given to get to know her.After all, she’d enthralled his father for thirty-four years.
A reddish-brown mark stained the bandages wrapped around her head.An oozing wound from her second surgery that required cleaning daily.The doctors continued to monitor the swelling on her brain.It was showing some improvement, although his mom still needed pain relief for the headaches she experienced.
“Devon and I own a garage.He works there full time.He’s married to Elisa.They have twin girls, Amaya and Zephyr.Cutest kids you’ll ever see.”He’d told her this before, but she was having difficulty retaining new information.
There were photographs on his phone.Part of him wanted to keep that part of his life private.She didn’t deserve to know.But he’d promised himself not to be a selfish jerk today.He showed her his cell, the shot he’d taken at Devon’s on the Fourth of July.Amaya, in her Star-Spangled Banner swimsuit, held Zephyr in a short-wrist chokehold disguised as a hug.Both girls were laughing.
She took the phone from his hands, tears filling her eyes.Her tears didn’t affect him the way they should.Had she stuck around, she would have seen the twins born.It was her fault she’d missed all that.
His sympathy reserves ran dry, and he snatched the phone back.He wasn’t ready for this.
“I have to go,” he said, standing up suddenly, the chair legs scraping noisily across the vinyl floor.
