‘Thingsaredifferent now, aren’t they?’ she murmurs.
The smooth darkness of his brow warps into a confused frown even as his lips curve in bemusement. ‘Yeah.’ He nuzzles his nose against hers. ‘You …’ he whispers. ‘Are …’ Another brush of his lips. ‘Wild, Anika Lapo.’
Wild. Unconstrained. She’s new. She wants this. She wantsmore.
‘I’m beginning to think I just might be.’
Chapter Thirty-Two
Cam’s words are still echoing in Anika’s head. They pulse through her whole body with every surge of adrenaline her heart pumps around it. The thrill of Cam’s body pressing into her against this wall with the world whirring past only a few steps away exacerbates the sensation.
He studies her, then she watches his eyes close, his mouth moving towards hers again. She savours the fragment of time when he can’t see her observing him – the brown of his irises being covered by the softness of his eyelids as they draw down, the deep richness of his skin, the slope of his eyebrows as they curve in concentration. The smooth, wide darkness of his lips blurs when he’s too close for Anika to focus on them. Instead, she gives in to the feel of them on hers and closes her eyes too. Cam’s hand caresses her jaw, tilting her head as his mouth presses in harder, and both of their lips part, Anika allowing entry to the hot sweep of his tongue. The kiss is more expert than it was when they were kids. Slow and teasing. Anika feels helpless as his fingers skitter down the side of her neck, his other hand sliding down to caress her ribcage,justteasing the underside of her breast, gathering the loose fabric of her dress inwards. He moves to press the other forearm flat against the wall as his body crowds in closer to Anika’s. Cam’s jaw flexes, his tongue moving in undulating waves against hers, and he lets out a low muffled ‘mmm’ sound that is widened by the set of his mouth.
Anika snakes one arm around his solid middle inside his suitjacket, the other still sandwiched between them from where she had gripped his T-shirt. She can feel the intense heat of his body through the smooth fabric. Finally she breaks the kiss, breathing hard. He’s on the edge of hardness against her hip and pulls back only fractionally, eyeballing her. The severity of Cam’s look is turning her on even more. Does he want this to escalate here? The thought is exciting, but Anika is interested in moving locations – not because of the public nature of the alleyway or, as might have once been the case, concern over the judgement of others should they be caught. It’s because the intimacy between them feels private in a way that is mind-spinning and urgent.
‘Let’s get out of here.’
He moves his mouth to the area just below her ear. ‘Where should we head?’ The rumble of his words tickles her skin and she shivers. ‘I want you to feel comfortable,’ he adds. His hand moves into the curve of her waist, caressing it. Her heart judders and Anika tilts her head, pressing her neck into his lips for a moment longer while she calculates. Something about going back to hers feels too vulnerable …
‘How about your place?’ She moves back to look at him, smiling. ‘I mean, provided you’ve not left your pants on the floor and your sheets are clean.’
‘Oh, ho ho,’ he says. ‘I’ll have you know I keep my place spotless.’
‘You do?’
‘Mariama does, once a week,’ he says with a chuckle. ‘I pay her double her asking rate, plus I tidy before she gets there.’
Anika nods, still smiling. ‘Naturally.’
Cam pushes away from the wall, away from her. ‘Let’s find ourselves a cab, then,’ he says, still gripping her hand as he pulls out his phone. They wander up to the main road and Anika is hit with the bustle of late-night central London. She balks at it, eager to be back in the intense cocoon of Cam’s embrace. Just asthe thought enters her mind, he pulls her in towards his side, his arm around her waist as he kisses his teeth at his phone screen.
‘These apps are messing us about, Ms Lapo,’ he mutters, then suddenly steps away from her, moving towards the kerb after pausing to allow a middle-aged couple to pass. He holds his hand out for a black cab, one hand casually in his pocket.Black cabs are starting to become a habit, she thinks absently. Still, she’s surprised when one pulls up to him first try. Cam leans into the window to speak to the driver, then pats the side of it and opens the door, nodding at Anika. She steps inside and he climbs onto the leather seat beside her, putting his arm around her shoulder.
Anika can’t quite believe this is all really happening, but she’s a little fearful of sliding back into submissiveness, the way she’s been in previous so-called relationships. It’s important that she doesn’t lose what she’s built up in herself. ButCam Asieduhas his arm around her, he’s interested in her, and they might soon be … She sucks in a breath, trying to calm herself down.
‘You’ve moved out the ends then, I guess,’ she quips to distract herself. ‘Getting a cab south wouldn’t be nearly this easy. Not to mention …’ She gestures towards the two of them pointedly, then glances at the pale, bald back of the cabbie’s head. ‘Do you live in Chelsea or some shit?’
Cam throws his head back, releasing a customary ‘hah’ at the grey felt ceiling in the back of the taxi. ‘You’ll see soon, innit.’ He holds her closer and she feels his body expand momentarily as he draws in a long breath. ‘Not gonna lie, Anika Lapo, this is quite the turn of events.’ He laughs. ‘Can I tell you how long I’ve been wanting to put my arms around you?’
‘According to your story back there, I’m guessing about thirteen years, right?’ Anika bites her lip and looks at him.
‘Nah, don’t try that.’ He moves closer, then uses one thumb to pull her lip out from where it’s clamped. ‘You felt it, too. I knowyou did.’ He moves his smile against her mouth and it takes everything in her not to blurt out that, yes, she felt it then and ever since, and shedefinitelyfeels it now. His fingertips inch up her thigh while they kiss.
‘Mm. OK, OK, OK,’ Cam pulls back, speaking quietly to himself. ‘Best not make things uncomfortable for the gentleman.’ His eyes flick back to the driver’s seat.
Anika giggles, realising Cam actually means it. Part of her wants to use her wiles to make him change his mind, but she’s always enjoyed a sense of anticipation. The sexy-polite dichotomy feels so quintessentiallyCam, so familiar, like the sense she shares with her closest friends. Anika’s mind drifts momentarily to her argument with Shameeka, the recollection cooling the heat she’s been feeling. It’s not her fault if her friends can’t see that she’s evolving – that she’s freer now than they’ve ever known her to be.If they don’t, is that their fault?Surprising herself, she pictures the faint glimmer of her brother’s hurt expression years earlier. There was the same hurt look in Shamz’s eyes tonight, and in Tina’s shocked reaction, trying to placate Anika’s sudden anger …
They’ll sort it all out. She can’t let any of that take her off her path.
I’m not going to stagnate.
I’m ready for anything, friend or foe.
They’re heading west, towards Shepherd’s Bush. Looking out of the window Anika is momentarily distracted by her thoughts, and Cam seems pensive too as the cab pulls into a road lined with old townhouses, no doubt long-converted into flats. The late hour means the street is mostly still. There’s just the rumble of the cab’s engine penetrating the quiet. Cam pays, steps out and waits as Anika slides over the seat and out the same side. He gently grasps her hand to help her descend.
‘Nice one, boss,’ he says into the open cab before pushingthe door gently closed in a manner that lets Anika know he’s considering his neighbours. The notion heats a flutter in her stomach thinking about the ways he might turn that consideration on her. It’s a level of attention that she’s not used to being paid – or to paying to another person, if she’s honest with herself. Is she selfish? Was she being selfish tonight with her accusations to her friends?
Not now. Don’t think about any of that now.
