Jane was rarely available to join us for dinner. In fact, I didn’t see much of Jane at all until late in the evenings. And by then, both of us were kind of burnt out and we had pretty surface conversations before calling it a night. Most nights when I came home from working in Montrose’s office, Lily would be asleep and Jane would either be asleep or not there at all.
She got a new car, a gift from her father. Or bribe, she called it. I hadn’t seen it yet, but she said it was a Corvette, which seemed kind of unlike Jane, but I guessed she didn’t get to pick it out herself. Seemed like it would have been a better bribe if it was a kind she wanted, but maybe the surprise element of it was what her father was going for.
After I’d have dinner and a study session with Lily, I’d go to Montrose’s office and get a few hours of work in, telling Lily I was off to my second job.
Each night he would leave a note—and more flash drives if needed—on what pile he’d like worked on next.
When I was done, I’d leave the flash drive in the middle of his desk blotter (never needing to move a laptop to make room, because he never left his again), with a note on how much I’d gotten done and where I’d left off.
When I was done with a complete pile, I’d do the cutting and pasting thing for it, then put all the notes and papers back in a box, labeled more clearly this time by the title of the book. Those completed boxes I put in the corner of his office with a paper over them that read “done.” That area of boxes grew as the piles on the credenza decreased.
I wasn’t exactly stalling and dragging this project out, but I didn’t break my fingers by speed typing, either.
I knew there were still a lot more boxes at his apartment and once I was finished here we’d have to figure out how we wanted to attack those.
A part of me hoped that the longer I took with this batch, the higher the chance that Montrose might thaw, and when it was time to make the decision, he’d opt for me working out of his apartment.
That would force us to be in the same room at least, though I suppose he could probably just stay at the office crazy late.
I got paid by the job, not the hour, so I never felt guilty if I just stopped typing for a while, took small breaks, and, I don’t know, stared at the photo of Montrose and his sister that sat on his desk.
His smile was broad and happiness was all over his face in the photo. He had smiled at me like that. While FaceTiming on New Year’s Eve, when we’d joked about something. When he had walked into this office on his first day back and found me sitting at his desk.
Although that smile had quickly turned heated, and less of happiness and more of pure want. My want, my desire, for him did not decrease even though my only contact with him was through notes left on his desk.
Even though it had been several weeks, I could still feel his hands on my butt, still taste his kiss.
I knew I would never forget.
* * *
A few daysbefore Valentine’s Day (which fell on a Saturday this year), I received a text from a Bribury girl I’d partied with a little bit fall semester letting me know where the best party for guy hunting would be on Saturday night.
Samantha Martin was from old money, with a family pedigree that went back to the Mayflower. She was also the biggest partier I’d met at Bribury. She was the one Bribury Basic with whom I most wanted to cultivate a friendship. She always knew exactly what to wear, and which functions to attend.
I had texted her like crazy fall term, asking where she’d be on the weekend, stuff like that. She’d always been friendly when I’d seen her, but I suspected that she might have been the one to originally put the label of poser on me that Jane so effusively shot down.
I supposed normal girls did this sort of thing all through high school, but I was just trying to stay alive and invisible during my high school years, and missed out on all the joys of frenemy bullshit.
It was immensely satisfying that she was the one texting me this time with party deets. And also satisfying that I hadn’t even once thought to text her yet this semester.
Personal growth, or Montrose obsession?
Probably a little of both.
I knew it was a given that Lily would be with Lucas on Saturday but since Jane hadn’t mentioned the ponytail guy at all, I asked her if she wanted to go out with me that night to the party Samantha had suggested.
She didn’t seem too excited about it at first, and I was ready to let it drop, but midweek she said yes.
I had a sense of dread about the whole upcoming weekend. If things weren’t going to happen with Montrose, it was time for me to move on, and see what might happen with a Bribury guy. I had checked out a few in the fall. Some had blown me off, some had shown some interest.
And yet, my heart wasn’t in it. The Bribury guys that I’d noticed, or hooked up with, didn’t appeal to me anymore.
I only wanted Montrose.
That option apparently not on the table, I tried to garner up the enthusiasm to go through with the evening that I’d cajoled Jane into.
I went to my closet and picked out the tightest red dress I owned and put it aside to wear on Saturday, talking Jane into doing the same. She ended up borrowing one from Lily. I didn’t think Jane owned any man-hunting clothes.
