He nodded and watched closely as the words poured out of her, and she thought if she could tell him the story in a hurry, it would be over just as quickly.
She raced on.“The photographer taught me how to pose, to always keep tension in my body for the best shots.She made me study other models, successful ones, and then emulate them.She got me signed to a top agency.They sent me on dozens of go-sees.Those are like interviews, to find out if the client likes your look for their product.”
“Almost like an actor on an audition,” he said in understanding.
“There is a lot of acting involved in modeling.I had to learn how to project fierceness for a fur coat shoot, to pretend playfulness for a bikini-on-the-beach job, or to shed heartbroken tears for a tissue company.”
Ben knew this was difficult for her.However, this was not the moment to let her off the hook.Especially after the fantastic sensual experience they’d experienced.His hard-on had still not abated.
“Obviously you were good at being a model.”So he wouldn’t keep staring at her, he picked up a tiny bird, cradled it in his hands and ran a finger over its downy back.He had her talking now.Second to kissing her, touching her, he wanted that more than anything.His curiosity about her was voracious.If he were denied holding her in his arms, at least for now, he’d gladly accept the next best thing: her attention.
He prompted her.“You were one of the top, if notthetop model in the world.”
“They said I had a natural aptitude for the work.They said the camera loved me.”
“It does,” he said with feeling.Carefully as though offering a gift, he cupped the chick with both hands and handed it to her.“I saw you on magazine covers.Vogue ...and stuff.”He couldn’t remember the names of the publications, only the stunning images of Sarah in her glory.
“Oh, I was the darling of moguls and movie stars.”She rolled her eyes at herself.“I spent a lot of time in Europe.In Paris, Italy, Berlin.Royalty loved me, rockers pursued me.”
“I remember one quote about you.It said you’d ‘redefined the industry and standards of beauty.’Like a lot of American models, you’re blonde, but your skin always looks fresh and tanned, and your eyes ...they tilt at each corner.It’s exotic.”
She held up her bird to the light.“I bought the superficial life, hook, line, sinker, and the wormy bait.I wanted it.Bad.So, I did all they said.I worked hard.”She paused.“Now, it seems so ridiculous, so silly.I can’t believe the things I thought were important.”She hesitated again.
Ben sensed her growing unease.With what she’d been through, he understood her reluctance to share.The conversation felt complicated because he had to fight down the memory of her sensual sighs and how the incredible orgasm he’d given her had made her delectable body shake.Wow!
Yet right then, he didn’t want her to stop talking.“Go on,” he said.“Please.”
“I should have gone to college, earned a useful degree.”She ran a finger down the bird’s downy back.“Anyway, the money rolled in.I made a fortune.”
“I can imagine.”
“A lot went down the drain on bad restaurant investments some famous actor or other wanted to open.But in reality, they knew nothing about the restaurant business.Me, either.”She rolled her eyes again.“I spent it on myself, on clothes, vacations, on an expensive penthouse apartment in New York City.Then, my manager stole money and I fired him.”
“An old story,” Ben said, suddenly sorry for her.“The crooked manager absconding with his wealthy client’s bank account.”
“He served time in jail, but the money was never recovered.Six months ago, when I came home to Montana, I had a nice nest egg, still nothing like before.Most of what’s left will be used to open my feed store.”
That was the moment he figured when she finally relaxed.Between petting the baby bird and talking about her feed store dream, Ben sensed finally she’d made it to more comfortable ground.He was pleased.All the way around, he was thrilled.Sarah had allowed him to touch her, and he would never forget those moments.
Then, she surprised him again.
Setting her tiny chick back under the warmer, she placed her hands on her thighs.“Ben, I appreciate the lesson, and I do feel better about knives now.”
“But?”When he heard her tone, he knew the other boot was about to bang down.
“There can’t be any more kissing ...or ...other stuff.”She hurried to continue.“I—I enjoyed it.I did.Nevertheless, this has to be the end of that sort of thing.I have too much going on right now, problems I’m dealing with.Life issues.The feed store start-up.Now this stalker.I just can’t add one more complication.”
Heartily disliking her conclusion, Ben figured equally robust patience was now called for.He’d liked the kiss, andother stuff,too.Liked ita lot.And he sure wasn’t going to accept herno moredecree.
He wouldn’t mention that.
“All right,” he said in mild tones he didn’t feel.“Anything you want.But you haven’t told me the most important part of your story.I’d really like to hear it.”
“What part?”Wary now, she gave him a sideways glance.
“Why’d you quit?Why walk away from all that fame and money and good times?What happened, Sarah?”There was an essential aspect she was leaving out.He could feel it.Something important.Something hidden.
Her face closed.
