In an effort to quell the storm inside me, I take several calming breaths, allowing the night air to fill my lungs. I close my eyes, concentrating on the symphony of energy and sound enveloping me as the water ripples around my body, washing away my anxiety. The hum of Baedyn resonates like a low, steady heartbeat, grounding me. A soft breeze brushes against my skin, the same breeze causing the oak leaves to rustle softly. I always find solace in nature, a halting of time that allows me to rest and gather my thoughts.
Before I know it, the moons sink beyond the horizon, their silvery light fading, signaling it’s time to return to the dorms. We’re permitted outside, but an unspoken rule warns against wandering into the darkness. Even with Baedyn’s protective wards, lurking dangers remind me that some dare to kidnap a royal for gold.
As I swim toward the shore, neon Sella fish flicker like tiny stars against the inky depths. I trail my fingers through the water, feeling their smooth, gel-like bodies brush against my skin, their curiosity matching my own. They dart playfully, illuminating the water with glowing colors.
I use my sweater to dry off, the fabric rough against my damp skin. I regret leaving my towel and swimsuit behind. My single thought at the time was to dip my toes. The brisk air wraps around me, raising goosebumps, yet the water’s warmth clings to my skin, shielding me from the chill.
My black panties and bra, a gift from my best friend, Ciara, offer little warmth. She’s away on her kingdom’s tour, not due back until next week, but her words echo:take more risks this year. Have fun, but don’t give away your Bond.She has somehow figured out the delicate balance of kissing boys and having fun while maintaining control. I’m a little jealous of that. I’ve always thought I have pretty good self-control, but when it comes to my emotions…well, I feel…a lot. My pants stick as I pull them on. I don’t want Aolyn to wake to an empty room and leave before we’ve had a chance to catch up.
“You know, you really shouldn’t sneak out.” I startle and then still, covering myself with my sweater. “Chancellor Xara would have to alert your parents,” Anders drawls. I can’t see him, but I’d recognize his voice anywhere.
The dark, husky caress of his voice should annoy me, but I can’t help the way the Bond light ripples. The sound is deep and resonates within me, melting me on the spot, but it’s also laced with sarcasm and danger. I should avoid him, I know I should, but I can’t…something about him elicits a sense of life. I am, however, annoyed at the way my traitorous body responds. My breathing becomes shallow, my core aches inappropriately, and I find myself wanting to spend just a few minutes testing out how I’d feel in his arms.
I look around in the fading light of the moons that will drop us into the few minutes of pitch black before the sun rises, and my skin prickles when I can’t find him. How the hell can he see me?
“I could say the same about you,” I snap as I fumble to get my buttons done on my pants. Anders steps out of the shadows of the tree to my right, jaw tense. He keeps his gaze locked on my face as he nears, his eyes smoldering.
“I told you, escort, remember? You don’t have to like it, I sure as hell don’t, but…” He tilts his head, watching me. “I won’t ignore my duties either.” He circles me like I’m his prey before standing in front of me, close enough that the heat radiating off his body warms me.
His eyes lock with mine, giving me time to finish the last of the buttons. Without ever tearing his eyes away, he reaches to the side, grabbing my corset.
“Get dressed,” he curses. “The last thing we need is you parading around without clothes on. It’s a sure way to lose your Bond, Raea.” His jaw clenches, his breathing heavy despite the look of pure annoyance on his face. In this light, his eyes are definitely a darker shade of blue, but the silver stirs, reminding me of a caged cat pacing.
A pastel, iridescent light ripples toward us. He can’t see it. Otherwise, I’m sure he would step back. I hold his gaze for a moment, letting the energy tickle my skin. His eyes darken with something like a warning before he brings the corset between us.
I grasp hold of it. Our fingers brush on contact, making me arch into him as emotions and power swirl through me like a gust of wind—emotions I’m not entirely sure belong to me. It’s power and lust. Need and longing. Light and dark. A collision of our souls. It’s the beginning of life, belonging, and something that feels a lot like home. A small, breathless moan escapes my mouth as he releases it so quickly that I nearly stumble, barely catching myself before bumping into his chest.
What the hell was that?
I take a cleansing breath to regain my thoughts. We are playingwith fire. He knows it. I know it. His heavy breathing indicates he felt all of that, too. I don’t know what the hell that was, but I’m not sure I want to ever feel it again. Not knowing how to make things less awkward than they are, I resort to sarcasm and attitude to hide my bewilderment.
“What? You’ve never seen a girl in her underwear before?” I scoff, pulling the fitted corset over my breasts as I lace up the back with practiced dexterity.
He groans almost silently, but I feel it. “It’s one thing to be in underwear,” he exhales. “It’s entirely different to be swimming in nothing. And yes, to answer your question, I have.”
Something twists in my chest. Surely not jealousy, but another part—anger—dominates every other emotion. “You were watching me?”
“Don’t worry,” he scoffs with a slight, arrogant tilt to his lips. My eyes drop there on their own accord. “I wasn’t watching you. I was a perfect gentleman.” He pauses, his eyes waiting for a reaction I won’t give him. He shrugs his hands into his pants casually before continuing. “I watched you leave the dorms and followed.”
“Unbelievable.” I pull my sweater over my head. I don’t bother letting him know I’m done before brushing past him, letting my shoulder collide with his arm.Dammit, he’s tall. I’m angry, embarrassed, confused, and yet, all I want is to turn around, push him against the rock wall, and feel the hard lines of his body pressed against mine. To feel his hands roaming over me. To feel all of that, whatever that was, again.
“Raea.” He reaches out, wrapping his hand around my wrist, yanking me back. I’m surprised at the gentleness with which he holds my wrist. It’s in stark contrast with everything about him. I’m pulled against his chest in one simple move, my back to his front. My body hums delightedly as he keeps a strong arm wrapped around me, pinning my wrist to my hip.
“Please, for the sake of your Bond,” he whispers against the shell of my ear, making goosebumps break out over my body. I close my eyes, and it’s all I can do not to lean back into him. “Stay fully dressed. I only have so much self-control.”
I can’t help the small gasp that escapes my lips and the heady feeling as I breathe him in. It’s warm and citrusy and something entirely unique that I haven’t been able to place. Something that brings up a memory, but no matter how hard I try, I can’t pull it forward into clarity.
We both held still, our breaths coming in fast, quietly trying to figure out what was next. Then, the sun burst from the horizon, shooting rays of gold and pink around us and awakening us. What the hell am I doing? I break free with what little resolve I have left and march back to the dorms, never looking back, knowing he has decided not to follow.
It’s going to be a long year.
five
. . .
“What did you do for break?”Aolyn and I are getting ready for dinner. We’re both in my bathroom, products spread on the counter before us. It’s the first time we’ve been able to catch up. As we chat, I focus on braiding the thick strands of my hair into sections before pulling it up into an intricate design.
I was beginning to worry after a full day of classes and not seeing her yesterday. She assures me she is fine. Apparently, being a division leader comes with the perk of meetings with Chancellor Xara, the professors, and dorm briefings. Not to mention, she was on a call with her mother late into the night.
