“And that would be?”
Catriona takes a deep breath before tipping her face up and warming me from the inside out like the burn of a good whiskey.
“Anything. I’d do anything you want to stop this,” she says. “Including getting on my knees… or marrying you instead.”
CHAPTER 4
CATRIONA
The moment the words come out of my mouth, I want to suck them back in. Panic flares then rises in my esophagus like a geyser. I’ve always made it a point to put my goals first, much to the detriment of my sex life, so marriage has been the last thing on my radar. Being tied down to a man like my mother hasn’t exactly been on my to-do list.
After tonight, O’Connor would be last on the list of candidates I’d consider chaining myself to.
But I’ll do it.
Even if it’s him. Despite what he’s done.
Maybe even because of it. It would serve him right to be married to me, forced to face the breadth of my loathing every day for the rest of his life.
I don’t examine the reasons that I can’t stomach the thought of him marrying her. Would they be honorable upon inspection? Probably not.
I have no illusions about the kind of man he is, yet I still find myself incandescent with rage all over again, fists clenched and teeth grinding. I’ll never admit it out loud, but fuck him for even considering this after that night. And fuck me for thinking it meant anything at all. I should know better. One thing for sure and two things for certain: I’ll never let my guard down around him ever again if I can help it.
If he’s determined to go through with this, then he’s going to learn exactly what regret tastes like. He’s going to understand his threats and intimidation won’t work on me.
“Did you think about me that much?” Aiden asks, leaning close enough with his full lips parting and his voice dropping a few octaves. The mocking note grates on my nerves. My vision tunnels, and my fists clench until my nails bite half-moons into my palms. As he studies me, my skin prickles like the ghosts of those hands are trailing all over my body. Breasts, hips, thighs. All the places where my dress stretches tight over my curves.
But the man who would have touched me, found all those places and worshipped them, is gone. He’s been replaced by the stranger in front of me. The one with a face so cold he could still be wearing that blank-faced mask. The fact that I fell for his act infuriates me almost as much as his words. I’ll blame it on grief. We all go a little mad sometimes, right? My sins aren’t as bad as murder, but fucking a psychopath and liking it feels just as unforgivable.
“You wish, O’Connor. I have better things to do with my time. The only reason I’m offering is because you’re fucking with my family. Is coercion the only way you’d ever get anyone to marry you? Makes sense, based on my personal experience, but I’m willing if it means you’ll leave her alone.”
He pushes back, his grin turning feral. It hovers there for a moment, reminding me of the man I’d known that night—the one who had gotten so thoroughly under my defenses that I lethim do unfathomable things to me. That I’d wanted him to do more.
“Your begging is cute now, but useless. What will it take for you to understand?”
Shock and fury thicken my voice and blur my vision with crimson. “You really are a fucking jerk. Why? Why does it have to be her? It doesn’t have to be me, but you can have anyone you want. Anyone else. Why is it so damn important that you have to marry her, or do you simply delight in being a bastard?”
His silver eyes flick back and forth between mine, and I do my best at shuttering my thoughts and expression. I suppress the urge to look away, to give him yet another moment of vulnerability. Because I’m not lying. I would do anything to keep this marriage from happening.
Whatever is left in his face hardens, turning cold, and I fight a shiver that traces skeletal fingers down my spine.
Finally, he says, “Envious, Catriona? Afraid to be left out? That I’d choose her? Jealousy is an ugly color on you.”
“Oh, fuck you, O’Connor,” I say, finally unleashing a sliver of the emotions rioting inside me. Then it’s overcome by fear, genuine fear, flashing through me like a lightning strike, and I know with a certainty that makes me ill he’s going to stick to his word. It feels like this whole situation is a car wreck that I’m being forced to watch from the sidelines, with no way to prevent the devastation. The momentum leaves me sick to my stomach. “The fact that you think I’m jealous about this situation is a testament to how insane you are.”
He crosses to me, sucking away the rest of the oxygen in the room with every step. He’s close enough that I can see every shade of gray in his mercurial eyes. “If you think this is insane, imagine how much worse I can be if you push me. Hmm? But don’t worry, so long as you behave, I promise I’ll be good to your sister.” His voice lowers. “So very, very good.”
I flash a cold smile. “If you go through with this, I’m going to spend every day making your life a living hell.”
For a moment, I think he’ll reconsider. But the bubble of hope pops in the next instant, leaving me numb and empty.
“As if it isn’t already,” he says. “There’s nothing you can do to change it. Now, be a good little pet like I know you can be, and accept this situation is one you can’t change.”
I grind my teeth together.
I resist the urge to plant my fist in his face.
Only barely.
