“No, darlin’. No, that’s not what I meant,” he said. His tone was far more patient than my snappy one deserved. “I know you can’t just shut that off. I meant, why do you let them talk to you at all? You said Kent has been encouraging you to cut them off, and I know it’s complicated, but wouldn’t it be worth it to live in peace?”
“I—” I didn’t really have an answer for that. My therapist had been floating the idea of blocking them on everything and goingno contact, and I knew I wanted to. I just needed to find the strength to take that step, and I wasn’t sure how to find it.
“Come here,” Creek said after a beat of tense silence. It was easy to crawl into his arms, straddling his lap. He ran his thumb from my stump to my knee, his other hand cupping my cheek. “I didn’t mean to make it worse, darlin’.”
I melted against his touch, and that single word burrowed under my skin, thrumming like a second pulse. “You didn’t. You make everything better.”
And I’m falling in love with you, I wanted to say, but I wasn’t going to. Not yet. It was too soon, and I would fall apart if I scared him off and lost this.
He pulled me closer to him, and I let myself just rest in his arms. “However you wanna handle them, I’m here for you.”
Our breathing matched pace as we turned our attention back to the movie I’d almost forgotten we’d put on. I was sleepy and happy, and after a little while, I turned my face into his neck and kissed his pulse point. “Stay tonight.”
“Yeah?” he asked. I knew he’d brought an overnight bag, but neither of us had mentioned it. I didn’t want to be too pushy, and I knew he wasn’t sure where the line was as he was still navigating what it meant to be exclusively dating. But tonight, I didn’t just want him. I needed him.
“Please? I’d like to wake up with you,” I told him.
He dragged his fingers through my hair, twisting my waves around his knuckles. “I’d really like that.”
Lifting my head, I kissed him, and he moved both hands to cup my ass. I was half-hard, getting harder as he began to rock against me. He moaned softly as our mouths moved together, tongues tangled—wet and heated. Everything he did to me felt so erotic but so tender. It was a feeling I wasn’t used to, but I wanted to accept it as our normal.
I wanted it to settle in my bones and live there. I wanted to know what all those romance novel happily ever afters were really about. I wanted to believe in them the way I believed in the turn of the earth, and the rising and setting of the sun, and the push-pull of the tide.
“Mm, darlin’,” he murmured. “I’m getting all worked up.”
“Me too.” I moved my hips a little faster, and he adjusted me so our cocks aligned through our sweats. It wasn’t as frantic as it had been before. It was easy, and a little careful, and absolutely perfect.
His tongue dipped between my lips again, and I smiled when I tasted cheese puffs.
“Am I funny?” he asked, voice a little breathless.
I ground against him, rocking my hips harder. “You’re perfect.”
He sucked in a sharp breath, fingers digging into my hips as he matched my pace. I could feel him twitching beneath me, the heat in my groin rushing up, my chest flushing. I wanted more than this—and maybe I’d have it soon—but I also realized that if this was all Creek ever wanted with me, I’d be content.
I’d be happy.
Nothing would change.
My eyes slammed shut as I came, and I felt him shudder beneath me before his moans met my own. He gripped me hard, head tipped down as his mouth searched for mine, and he rode his aftershocks with a sloppy kiss, sharing his breath with me.
When it was over, I rolled off, and he grimaced down at the wet spot on his lap.
“I have a washer,” I said with a chuckle. “Come on, let’s hop to the bedroom and call it a night.”
“I kind of hate that you mean ‘hop’ literally,” he said as he braced himself on the arm of the sofa and stood.
I grinned. “Race you.” Then, I took off.
I won, but only by a hair, and my victory only lasted for the moments it took for Creek to tackle me to the bed and kiss the next breath right out of my lungs.
If the circumstances had been different, I probably would have blamed my insomnia on having Creek in my bed for the first time, but I knew that wasn’t it. He and I had fooled around until his movements started getting slow and heavy. Eventually, we’d tapered off into soft kisses until he was snoring quietly against the pillow I most definitely had bought for him in hopes that nights like this would happen.
I tried to lie there as long as I could, but eventually, I had to crawl out of bed and sneak out of the room. I’d left my leg in the living room, so I slipped it on and carefully headed down to my garage.
Waxing my boards was always meditative, so I used the manual garage door opener to let the cool night air in, sat on a chair near the wall, and began to work. My fingers felt a little stiff, and my back ached from the workouts I’d been getting under Creek’s hands.
I felt both amazing and terrible at the same time, and I wanted to carve the ugly parts right out of me. The sad part was I already knew the things that needed to go to make my life feel a thousand times better. All it would take was a single email to my mother and a few blocked numbers. And while my family problems wouldn’t go away, they would be relegated to the dark parts of my past that I wouldn’t have to look at anymore.
