The only problem was: what if — after all the courting was done — I wanted all three of them?
CHAPTER 21
Leonin
“I’ve givenyou significant time, Leonin,” my mother said with her usual stern-love voice. The queen was in one of her not-to-be-trifled-with moods. “Have you chosen which priesthood you will join?”
This had been her “offer” for me roughly a year ago: more like an ultimatum. I had a year of leeway, but only to research each priesthood and determine which god I would serve.
I had hoped for more time before she called on me to choose. I wanted to tell her of the work I’d been doing with Tisera and how amazing I felt because of it. But I wasn’t ready yet. I still had so much to learn.
I’d been practicing the few moves I knew and trying them in different combinations. They came easily enough, now that I’d practiced the Hells out of them, but I was far from a seasoned warrior.
I needed more time before I presented my counteroffer to my mother.
I didn’t know why the combat training I’d been put through as a young man hadn’t clicked. Perhaps Tisera was right and they’d been trying to teach me the wrong weapons in the wrong way. I didn’t really know, and at this point, I didn’t care. Yet Tisera had opened me up to a whole new perspective. I’d always thought myself weak and not the fighting type — and compared to my brothers I wasn’t — but now…
Still, I couldn’t tell my mother, not yet. I wasn’t far enough along. I had to stall, buy more time.
“Mother, I have, alas, only come so far in my religious studies. I have spent much time with the clerics of Aestric and Assa, and learned much from their vast libraries, but there is too much to learn in just one year. I have yet to participate in the rites and rituals of Helea and Olerin, I missed out this past spring, but the mid-summer revels are coming up. I could?—”
“Must you?” the queen said, a horrified look on her face.
I’d known that would get a reaction. She didn’t want to picture her son naked and lost in a sea of bodies at one of the Halean orgies. In truth, that held little appeal for me, but having always been the studious son. I could easily make the case that if I were to join a temple, I’d need to tryallof them first, and that included the less savory ones, like Halea, goddess of love, sex, and fertility.
Olerin wasn’t quite so bad, a god of nature. Yet his spring rites were — if not overtly sexual — very much full of the suggestion of all the things a god might do to make the land fertile for the coming year. There was even a joint spring rite between the Helean and Olerin Priesthoods which was far more overt. The Mid-summer revels were purely a Halean rite and encouraged all unmarried men and women to try out something orsomeonenew… usually many someones, often at the same time.
“If I am to experience the fullness of each priesthood, I should at least try one rite from each. As you know, I participated in the new years’ rites of Assa this past year. It would be unfair of me not to try some of the others.”
The queen grimaced in distaste but hid it quickly. “If you must.” After a sigh, she added, “I would have thought you’d take to the temple of Wisteri.”
It was what she’d suggested initially. As a bookish man, the goddess of knowledge did seem a natural fit. And in truth, I loved their libraries, the largest in the lands. But, since I didn’t really want to be in the priesthood to begin with, I had tempered my own lust for knowledge and forced myself to try different things.
“I am very curious about the temple of Brovos,” I said with a grin, testing the waters a little. “I believe I could become a warrior priest someday, perhaps even a general.”
It wasn’t unheard of for high-ranking members of the priesthood of Brovos to become generals, since Brovos was the god of war.
“Oh, Leonin, truly? You’re still harboring that fantasy?” Her look of complete dismissal stabbed to the core of my being.
I tried to hide how much it hurt. I could be a great general, but she had no faith in me. Even if I couldn’t fight, I knew history and strategy and tactics as well as any of our generals.
The queen sighed heavily and shook her head. “Leonin… Leo… my dear son. Don’t you see? If you become a general that will only hurt our relationship with Eromore, which already hangs by a thread. They already question your decision to marry Lady Theodora of Vestrea. They only have our word that she wished for the marriage and died by illness, not by other means. Can’t you see how it looks if her husband, the man who tore one of their provinces away, went on to become a general? It will seem like we always intended war with them, and you knowthat’s not the case. I need you to be penitent and meek. Join a quiet priesthood and study, you love to study, don’t you?”
I sighed. I could see her point, but still, it wasn’t what I wanted. “I do, Mother, I do.”
“Then do that? Please Leonin, I’m begging you.”
“I’ll consider it, Mother. I am sorry I am taking so long to choose.”
“I’ll give you until the end of the summer, no longer.” I could see her struggle with her next words. “Try… whatever you must. Take the summer to… get out any of your urges and fantasies. But by the end of the summer, make a choice, please.”
“I will, Mother.”
I’d just sealed my fate. I had roughly two months to either choose a priesthood or… develop the combat skills others learned over years of training so I could prove my skill as a general.
I left my mother’s private chambers and made my way toward my own.
I was stunned when I looked down a long hallway and saw Tisi standing guard outside my brother’s rooms. She seemed distracted and didn’t look my way.
