I believed him.
“Any questions?” Maverick asked.
“What do we do if we find the leader of these rogue Nobles?” Silence asked softly. “What if it is the queen herself?”
Maverick sighed. “Midnight has my orders around that.” He shook his head. “I hope this doesn’t go that far up, but I fear it does.” He grimaced. “But we can’t just go after them. We’d need the support of other Nobles, other Houses or we’d seem like the betrayers, the criminals in all this. So, part of your mission is also to find out who’s not involved so we can drum up some support.”
Silence nodded.
There were no more questions after that.
“We head out tomorrow morning,” Maverick said to me, Jack, and Amber. Then he rose and stepped out into the rain.
Both Sparrow and Silence were looking at me expectantly. I’d be leaving them tomorrow. That meant we had most of a day to kill, and I had a lot of pent-up energy to spend.
Chapter 14
My heart thunderedas Silence and Sparrow followed me out to the barn. The rain had stopped, but the clouds were still low and heavy, making the day gloomy and grey.
I’d asked the two of them out, away from the others, to clear the air and get things straight between us. And getting things straight would be great, if I actually knew what that looked like. My emotions were a tumbling mess of confused desire and friendship.
I was so distracted by my thoughts, I didn’t even look for a ladder once inside the barn, I just jumped up to the hay loft and threw down the blanket I’d brought. Then I wondered why it was taking so long for the others to get up here.
Sparrow flew. Silence climbed, actually using the ladder.
I sat on the blanket, the soft hay a cushion beneath me and they did the same, looking from each other back to me.
Where to start?
Start with what you know. Tell them how you feel, even if it is confused.
I nodded.
“I love you both,” I said, taking a moment to look into each of their eyes… soft brown and deep green. “You are dear friends to me and… more. Though I don’t know how to quantify that more, or if I need to.” I paused for a breath.
How do I tell them about Alvere?
Again, just tell them how you feel,Auwei advised.They’ll understand or they won’t, but if you’re going to be honest with them, you need to tell them and let them be however they’re going to be: upset, or angry or accepting or whatever.
You’re so Wise.
I know.
“I am not ready to make a choice,” I said softly, again, looking deeply at each of them. “And, I’ll be honest, I hope I don’t have to make a choice. I love you both… as well as… others.”
“Others?” Sparrow breathed. Then, she seemed to make a connection and nodded. “The prince?”
I nodded in return. “Yes.”
“The prince?” Silence said. But he had a quick mind. He must have been told the prince of Vauphan had been visiting, and our nation had no prince so… “The prince of Vauphan? You… love him too? Have you been with him?” There was a shocked — and slightly pained — curiosity in the man’s soft voice.
“No… well, not like I’ve been with both of you. We kissed once, but I couldn’t go any further in good conscience without speaking to both of you first.” It had been a little more than just one kiss, but most of that “more” had been unrestrained feelings and not true actions.
Silence nodded to that, still seeming a bit distant. Then his brow furrowed and he looked at Sparrow. “You two have…?”
She nodded with a shy smile. When Sparrow spoke, her voice was a flighty thing, like her avatar form. “I had always been… curious about… women, and I love Legs dearly and…” She shrugged. “Now I know how I feel.” She looked away from Silence with the whispered addition of: “I still don’t know how I feel about men.”
“A lot of men can be jerks,” Silence said with a grimace.
