I nod. “She held your funeral after the police announced you were a wrong time, wrong place, tragedy. The club stayed away, but we went and paid our respects to whoever the fuck is eternally resting in your grave. Even the dog laid on the grave and refused to move.”
He laughs but it’s as dead as we thought him to be. “If I had have died that night, I’m glad the dog would’ve missed me.”
I hear what he’s saying but I make sure he knows, “We all did, brother. The place hasn’t been the same since.”
I tap the cigarette on the table and say, “After everything you’ve been through, you’re gonna need time to process but I wanna know if you want out. I’ll understand if you want to walk away.”
“I knew if you found out I was alive, you’d come find me and you did. You told me to trust you, to trust the patch and I did. It’s all I had most days. I’m a Lost Soul. I’m not going anywhere.”
I can’t help but smile. Tor says it’s rare when I do so I’m glad Ford’s the only fucker around to see it. “I won’t make the offer again, so be sure, brother. It’s fucked up but let this make you stronger. Let it keep your eyes open wider and your senses sharper. You’ve seen how bad a plan can turn out, learn from it and I will too. I have done already.” With Ford adamant he wants to remain a Lost Soul, I tell him, “We’ve got her.”
His brows pinch together in confusion. “Her?”
Smirking, I clarify, “Effie. She’s upstairs. She’s how we knew you were still alive. She tried using it to save her life.”
“Of course she did. Is she alive?”
I snort. “Yeah. I came close to putting her in the ground but at the last minute I thought you were the one who deserved the pleasure of snuffing her out.”
I watch him closely. There’s not a single part of him that flinches at the thought taking out Effie Rathbone. But I still say, “If that’s something you don’t want to do, I’ll happily take it on for you.”
A darkness washes over him, and he leans forward on the table. “I’ll do it. I’ll show her why she made a huge mistake.”
I lock down my smirk. I wouldn’t have thought any less of him, this time, but it soothes me that he wants this.
“Let me know when, and she’s gone,” I promise.
Light footsteps catch my attention, and Tor walks in with River. I lean back in my chair and claim her kiss as she leans over and presses her lips to mine.
“How long have you two been up?” she asks as I pull out a chair for her.
She sits down as I ask, “Is he due a feed?” She nods and I rise, heading to the counter to make my son’s bottle.
“He looks like you, Victoria,” Ford murmurs.
“Really? You think? Everyone keeps saying he’s the spit of Luca.”
“His dark hair, maybe, but his eyes are yours.”
“I think he has Luca’s eyes.”
“Nah, he’s got your eyes, for sure.”
As I shake the bottle mixing the formula with hot water, I see Tor smiling down at River in her arms.
“Here, you haven’t had a cuddle yet. You should meet him properly. You’re going to be a big part of his life, after all.”
Ford freezes. “I’m covered in bruises, I’ll scare him.”
“No bruising scares my son, brother,” I grunt.
The moment he has River in his arms, it’s the first time I see him relaxing. Tor crosses the kitchen and takes River’s bottle from me. She tests it on her wrist and runs it under the cold water for a minute.
“Doesn’t it scare you that the worst out there could one day get to him?” Ford murmurs.
Normally I’d take offence but he’s coming from a vulnerable place right now. It’s Tor who takes her seat back at the table and says, “Ever since I gave birth, everything scares me when it comes to him. Sometimes in the night I’ll get up, terrified he’s stopped breathing. I’ll stand there in the dark, watching, waiting for his chest to rise and fall. I’m scared every second of every day.”
“How do you deal with that?”
