Claire arrives first, then Madison, then Daisy, then Alexa and Lauren. We make ourselves perfect little plates (I make guesses as to what goes well together or mimic what the others do) and get our wine and sit in the first row of lounge chairs that face the giant screen, where we put on Madison’s latest movieMake Your Move(a rom-com about competing chess champions) that just released on Netflix today.
Madison cringes at her acting in certain parts, or laughs before the scenes fully unfold because she knows everything that went on during filming.
“Andrew couldnotkeep it together for that shot,” she says, “and we had to do like twelve takes.”
Her co-star is the quirky and lovable Andrew LaBell, known for his iconic dimples.
“Oh! We shot this scene the day after I got food poisoning, so the look of disgust on my face is not acting—I was genuinely nauseated.”
Having a running commentary on the whole thing is actually perfect, considering the quality and pacing of the movie.Madison pokes fun at the low-budget props and the script (and gives the rest of us permission to do so as well) knowing it’s all very cheesy but having had a great time making it nonetheless.
When it’s over, we migrate to my loving room and get the fireplace going. The weather has been unusually chilly the last couple days, and overcast, matching my mood, but the fire and the company help.
We drink more wine and I break out some Godiva chocolates as everyone but me and Daisy request music on my sound system—mostly my songs and Daisy’s so they can ask about what inspired each one. I learn that a lot of Daisy’s music, like mine, is based on past relationships, she just likes to be cheeky about it, and blunt to the point where people think she can’t possibly be serious.
“You like to make people squirm,” Lauren points out.
Daisy smiles and shrugs one shoulder. “We’re all thinkin’ the same things, so why bother bein’ coy? Let’s just put it all out there.”
At first, I dread talking about my own work because, even though I have chosen (in a way) to share parts of my life with the public, it’s a lot more personal when someone asks me directly about a song’s meaning. But as I tell these women my stories, I find myself relieved to be all the way open. Even better, I find them sympathetic, empathic. So many of our experiences seem to be universal.
Eventually the conversation shifts to working hours and entertainment industry pet peeves, and then we try on a bunch of my flashier clothes while belting Britney songs (because we are slightly drunk at this point) along with some Christina, Avril, Beyoncé, Shania, Carrie, and Taylor. We end up back on the sofas, withMean Girlsplaying on the regular TV (not the home theater) and I’m pretty sure every minky blanket I own is in herewrapped around one us. I must have dimmed the lights but I forgot when, and finally, I leave the waking world.
“Being alone with my thoughts is … a lot right now.”That’s what I told Riff once. I remember how he understood, how he said he, too, often couldn’t sleep unless he had “some other noise going.”
“So your mind can focus on something trivial,” I said, “and you don’t mentally spiral yourself into an adrenaline rush that keeps you awake …”
And then he said, “Exactly.”
This night has been the perfect distraction, the best way to focus my mind elsewhere.
But it was anything but trivial.
I Need to Be Bold, Need to Jump in the Cold Water
RIFF
“I’llstartwithanobvious question,” the moderator says into his microphone as he glances down the long table at me and four other country music artists. “What are the ingredients to a perfect country song? What goes into the ‘secret sauce’?”
A West Coast Country Con logo is attached to the side of the lectern that faces an audience of a hundred or so.
I glance down at my itinerary for the day.
8:30 AM– Artist Check-In
9:00–9:50 AM– Panel: “The Anatomy of a Country Hit”
10:00–10:20 AM– Press Line / Mini Media Roundtable
10:30–11:15 AM– Breakout Session: “Branding Yourself Without Losing Yourself”
11:30–12:00 PM– VIP Meet & Greet
12:00–1:00 PM– Artist Luncheon / Networking Café
1:15–2:00 PM– Speed Autograph Signing (Open to All Attendees: First Come, First Served)
2:15–3:00 PM– Artist Roundtable: “Songwriting Chats”
