“True. Maybe that means something.”
God, I hope it doesn't.
“We could ask her to choose.” My earlier thoughts are coming back to me. “Like an ultimatum.”
Brady shakes his head. “Not an ultimatum. That would mean she has to choose or something bad will happen.”
“Something badwillhappen, Brady. It’s been eight years since we’ve seen her, and nothing has changed. I don’t know about you, but I tried to forget her. I got as far as a three-month relationship, and my heart never even took a baby step away from Lennon.”
“Me neither. And, since you were honest about kissing Lennon, I should be honest and tell you that I saw her two years ago in Dallas.”
I turn and stare at him. I need to look back at the road but I don’t fucking want to. Brady points somewhere out the windshield, giving me a reminder I don’t need.
My gaze leaves him and goes to where it should be, but my mouth is set in a grim line and my jaw is clenched.
“You went to visit her?”
“I was there for work. I met her for dinner. Don’t act like you wouldn’t have done the exact same thing.”
I should’ve done it. That’s what I’m really mad about. I should’ve hopped on a plane and shown up on her doorstep. I should’ve bent her over backward and kissed her until all the breath in her lungs belonged to me.
I stare ahead and drive. I thought I had this competition in the bag, but it doesn’t feel like it anymore.
23
Now
Brady
I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but helping Finn is making me appreciate my job.
Installing hardwood floor is more difficult than I thought it would be. At first I thought of it like a puzzle. But, no. There’s a lot more happening beneath the rows of wood we walk on.
I asked Finn why he didn’t just hire someone to do the job for him. He looked at me like I was beyond help and told me there are some parts of this house he wants to be touched by only his hands.
I blinked at the intimacy in his words. His sentence had two meanings, and only one made me uncomfortable.
I wasn’t lying to him on our drive. My night with Lennon did not extend beyond a handful of passionate kisses. I thought we were going there, to a place we’ve never gone before. She laid below me on the bed, matching my kisses, my wandering hands, my intensity. Then, like a puff of smoke, the woman who was lost in the moments with me disappeared. Lennon’s lips no longer met me hungrily; instead, she merely accepted my kisses. Her hands stopped searching. I felt it the second it happened, but I wanted it, wanted her, so badly that I didn’t stop right away.
When she whispered my name, I knew it was over. I rolled off her and looked up at the ceiling.
“I’m sorry,” she said. It wasn’t just her words that let me know how sorry she was. Regret saturated the air, filling it until it became something I could gather. No longer was Lennon in my arms, but in her place, I held her apology.
We fell asleep on top of the covers. When I woke with the sun streaming in through the cracks in the blinds, Lennon smiled at me. She reached over and brushed hair from my forehead.
“You’re handsome in the morning.”
I cracked a smile. “As opposed to the rest of the day?”
Lennon groaned and rolled off the bed. She stood and stretched. Her shirt pulled up, exposing an inch of her creamy skin. Skin I’d had my hands on last night. Skin I don’t know if I’ll ever touch again.
I led the way from the pool house and opened the door for her to step into the main house. And that’s when I saw the reason Lennon disappeared from my arms last night.
And now I’m working beside him, watching him use a flooring nailer. It’s a tool I’d never heard of until he pulled it from the back of his truck and explained what it was.
Despite being at odds, we make a good team. I rack the flooring (another term I learned today), which means I’m arranging the boards in the order they should be installed. Each bundle of wood tends to be the same color, so they have to be mixed and matched. Finn follows behind me, installing what I’ve arranged.
We break for lunch, mowing down the sandwiches Finn picked up in town. Brighton’s a small town, but it has everything someone could need. I can see Finn settling here. He always hated Agua Mesa.
