“Malachi and Karis’ wedding.” Even though I’m saying their names, I’m not picturing them at all. Instead I see Aidan in the greenhouse with confused emotions tumbling through him, scooping up my shoes and leading me to the hotel, rocking above me in the bed. My eyes tighten and burn at the memories. I turn away and fiddle with something on my nightstand so Savannah won’t see how upset I feel.
“Who?” she asks. Hangers scrape against the metal rod, and I surreptitiously grab a tissue and blot at my wet eyes.
“Friends from college.”
“Gotcha. Oh, this one!”
Savannah holds out a red top. Her raised eyebrows seek my approval.
“Perfect,” I tell her.
“I’ll go get dressed. You better get changed too. Drew’s shift starts” —she looks down at her watch— “in ten minutes.”
Savannah leaves, and I grab the first dress I see in my closet. As I’m pulling the dress over my head, my phone chirps with a text. I grab it and see Aidan’s name.
I miss you.
I stare at those three little words. I miss him too. Terribly. But how can you miss something you only had for such a short time? And how can you miss something that’s technically still there? Another text comes through.
I’m a straw.
Immediately I understand what he means. He’s empty on the inside.
I write back.I’m a straw too.
I wait for those three response dots to appear, but none do. After a minute, I set down the phone and finish getting ready. When Savannah and I are walking to the elevator, my phone chirps again. It’s Aidan.
Best?
I’m still here,I write back.
He doesn’t say anything else. Perhaps that’s all he needed to know.
19
Natalie
Charity and Marihave met us at the bar. I've never seen either of them so done up, but they are both single and this is a bar, so I guess the math makes sense. Drew approaches our table with a third round. In his hands are two martini glasses, Savannah is behind him with the other two.
“Thank you,” she coos after the drinks are set on the table. She pulls him in for a kiss, and I look away as the kiss turns deeper. Charity sticks her fingers between her lips and whistles loudly. Savannah laughs and sits down while Drew retreats to his place behind the bar.
Mari lifts her glass into the air. “To Natalie. I hope you get the hell out of the funk you’ve been in.”
“What are you talking about? I haven't been in a funk.” I clink my glass against the others and take a sip.
Savannah nods as she swallows. “Yes, you have. I would know.” She gives me a pointed look. “I live with you.”
There are three sets of eyes staring at me now, and I don't know if it's that or the martinis, but I open my mouth and tell them everything. I need more people to confide in than my sister. She may only be four hours away, but sometimes it feels like so much more.
“The hot guy from the street… Wow. How was it?” Charity leans forward, ready to hear the juicy details. Under the table, Savannah finds my hand and gives it a squeeze. She understands that this goes much, much deeper than sex.
Everything inside me has been so heavy for so long, as though my blood has been replaced by lead. Instead of talking about my broken heart, I tell them something fun and light. I tell them about Aidan's jealousy over the best man, how I found Aidan in the greenhouse and then we decided to get a room. All three of them make different gleeful sounds of surprise when I tell them we ran into Beckett in the hallway.
Charity drinks the last of her martini. “You've left out the part about the steamy sex, but I'll let you slide this time. I wish your story had a happier ending.”
I swallow the lump in my throat. “Me too.” Apparently happy endings really are just for romance novels and those who get extremely lucky. In my twenty-eight years, I've been very unlucky.
“Why don't you fight for him?” Mari asks.
