Anna is talking about her class load at NYU, but I'm only half listening. My mother and Natalie are talking, and I'm straining to hear their conversation. I don't know why I’m so interested, just that I am.
“…thought Shawn was going to be here,” Natalie says.
My mom responds, but I can't hear because her back is turned to me.
Natalie leans in closer to my mom and says something in a hushed tone. Her eyes flicker over to me, and when she sees me watching her, she quickly looks away.
“Aidan, your dad says you're a teacher in the city. What America’s youth like these days?” John’s question brings me firmly back into the conversation at the table.
I tell him my funny stories. The ones about the jock and his girlfriend who can't keep their hands off each other, the ones about the best excuses I've ever heard for being late or not having completed homework. I don't tell him about the student in my seventh period class who I'm almost certain is throwing up her lunch, or the kid with holes in the bottoms of his shoes. Telling strangers about those kids’ hardships feels like a betrayal.
John rests an arm across the back of Melinda's chair. “Not so different from us then.” His smile is a tad smug and it irritates me.
I shake my head in agreement and say nothing. America’s youth, as he put it, will never know life without a smartphone, never have to wait through TV commercials, and will probably have a better work-life balance than his generation ever dreamed of having. But sure, they're totally similar.
My dad walks back into the kitchen with a tray balancing four red martinis. Shawn is behind him with a tray of four more. “Who is ready for a cocktail before the meal?"
My hand flies into the air. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Natalie do the same.
My dad serves my mom first, pretending as though he needs a kiss on the cheek before he can give her the drink. She laughs and obliges, and while Melinda and Anna areaww-ingabout it, I watch Natalie. I've always known the heart can yearn for something, but until this moment I never knew you could watch the feeling on someone's face. Her features have softened, and her eyes are wistful.
I've never understood Natalie's obsession with love. Is she not frightened by the power love wields? Twenty years ago my mom wrote a story about love, and she still gets letters about how it has changed people’s lives and convinced them that love is worth the risk. It is only the written word, and it holds power. What would the real thing be like?
Glass clinks on the tabletop as Shawn places a martini in front of me. I look up to thank him and offer him a handshake. Shawn grabs my hand in his and claps me on the back. I cough and lean forward as though he is hurting me, but it's not that far from the truth. Years of personal training have ensured that Shawn is basically like a brick.
“Maybe we ought to get you back in the gym. Toughen you up a bit.” He delivers a light one-two punch in my arm.
Shawn is tall, with broad shoulders and perfect, white teeth. His muscles are long and lean. I’ve never seen him in anything but tiptop shape.
“No way. I'm not going back to the gym with you. You’re a maniac.”
Shawn raises his glass, and everybody follows suit. “To maniacs.”
I meet Natalie's gaze. “To maniacs,” we repeat, our eyes on each other, both of us laughing after we say it. Natalie lifts her glass an inch higher, a second toast meant only for me. I mimic her and wink, then toss back the drink. It tastes of cranberry and orange, and it's strong. The drink is chilled, but instantly my chest feels a few degrees warmer.
Natalie puckers her lips after a small sip. “That,” she says, setting it down and pointing at the glass, “is trouble.”
“That,” Anna says, doing the same as Natalie, “is delicious.”
My mother announces that dinner will be ready in five minutes, and I take that time to take our bags upstairs. Natalie follows, stopping at the foot of the bed where she'll be sleeping. She reaches for her bag and unzips it.
“Anna seems nice.” Natalie removes items from her bag as she speaks.
I shrug. “Yeah, I guess.”
Natalie gives me an exasperated look. “Don't tell me you don't know what's going on here.”
Her question confuses me. “Apparently you know something I don't. Care to share your knowledge?”
Natalie rolls her eyes and shakes her head. “How can you be so thick?” She removes a pair of black leggings from her bag and sets them on the bed.
Patting my stomach, I say, “I mean, maybe I should take Shawn up on his offer. I could learn to like the gym.”
Natalie pulls out her toiletry bag and walks into the adjoining bathroom. Peering into the mirror, she rubs a fingertip under each eye, and says, “They're trying to set you up with Anna.”
Oh.I guess I am thick.
Natalie looks at me through the mirror and laughs. “Poor Aidan. You had no idea. Not that it matters. Aren’t you seeing Allison?”
