“Let’s go,” I say before I can think too much about her comment. She’s overwhelmed by the place, that’s all.
I hold the door for her as we walk into the mudroom. I’m happy the house is warm because it’s chilly and overcast outside. Northern California beaches are nothing like their Southern counterparts. They are chilly, often foggy, and never overcrowded.
After depositing our bags on the kitchen counter, I grab her by the waist and spin her to face me.
“Do you want a tour?”
“Not really,” she says. “What I really want is to get changed and go”—she points out past the windowed wall to the glittering ocean—“out there.”
“Your wish is my command, my lady.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” she smarts, giving me a playful look.
Digging through her bag, she pulls out black leggings and a sweatshirt, and does the best thing I’ve ever seen in my eighteen years. She peels off her T-shirt and pushes down her cut-offs. Her bra and underwear land on top of the heap at her feet.
She laughs at my astonished face, and all I can think isI love this girl. Not because she’s naked in front of me, though that’s nice too. Really flipping nice.
She’s bold and brave, audacious but tender. Kind.
“I love you,” I yell out. I don’t care anymore. I don’t have to wait a certain number of months. I don’t even have to worry that I’m too young to love. Ember takes all that worry away.
“Shmily,” she says. Her grin fills her face.
“What?”
It’s becoming hard to focus. She’s still naked, and even though I’ve seen parts of her naked, it was never the whole. The whole is beyond words. It’s taking every ounce of self-discipline I have not to bound over to her right now, lift her, and set her on the counter. The only thing stopping me is knowing it will be her first time.
“Shmily.” She pulls on her leggings, tugging them up over the curves of her hips and letting go with a snap. I’m sad to see her sweatshirt go on, but feel better when I realize she’s not wearing a bra anymore.
She walks to me and lifts my shirt. Her fingers butterfly over the faint outline of the word. I tried not to wash it off but it was difficult. “See How Much I Love You. Shmily.”
I say it over in my head, slowly. “It’s an acronym.”
Ember taps the tip of her nose.
So, she said it first. Weeks ago.
Of course she did. She felt it, and that was all there was to it. No worries over convention.
“You better believe I’m going to show you how much I love you. Later.” I drop my shorts too. Two can play this game. Ember’s trying to keep her mouth from dropping in her shock. I may have seen her parts, but she hasn’t seen mine. I feel a surge of pride and ownership knowing my body will be the first one she touches. Is it crazy of me to also want it to be the last?
She gulps, raising her eyes up to meet mine. I can’t help my smirk. Watching her reaction is too good.
“Beach?” she asks, the word drawn out.
“Sure.” I pull on my trunks and lead the way outside. I stop to grab two beach blankets from a plastic trunk beside the white wooden gate. Ember eyes the blankets, unsure. “It’s only April,” I remind her. “Once we get down there, you’ll want these.” Pushing on the gate, I step through the opening and lead her onto the narrow sandy walkway.
We stay on the beach for hours. Ember watches the waves for a long time, alternating between talking and growing quiet. I lie back on the blanket and tug on the other blanket wrapped around her shoulders. She let’s me pull her down into me, and we kiss until we’re out of breath. When the bright sky grows dull, and then duller still, we sit up in time to watch the sun dip below the horizon.
Ember announces her hunger the way a starving man might. “Food,” she tells me, hanging on my arm. “Need food. Now.” She pretends to swoon.
“Come on. Let’s get changed and get you fed. We’ll have to go somewhere. There isn’t any food at the house.” Taking her by the hand, we head back up with our beach blankets thrown over our shoulders.
Ember knew better than to change in front of me this time; instead, she went to the bathroom to get herself ready.
The next time I see her naked, all bets are off.
Quickly, I send a message to Tripp and thank him for covering for me tonight. Later on, I’ll text my mom and tell her I’m staying the night at Tripp’s. While Ember’s in the bathroom, I change and grab my phone to search the internet for a good place for us to go eat.
