I know my plan was to explore her breasts, but my hand seems to have a mind of its own. It’s trails down, over the flatness of her stomach, and dips beneath the waistband of her sweats. Skimming along the smooth skin between her hip points, my hand rides her rapid breathing like a wave.
She’s sweeter than frosting, spicier than gingerbread, and every cell in my body is screaming at me to devour her.
My hand drifts lower, lower, lower.
Go slowly. It’s our first time together, and I want to cherish it.
I bring my mouth to hers and kiss her deeply, drinking in the girl who splashed her way into my life, and proceeded to soak my whole being.
Heat radiates from between her legs, searing the palm I have held an inch above her.
I can’t take it anymore.
I can’t take the tip of her nose running up and down my neck. The arch of her back and the soft, mewling sounds she makes when I kiss her.
“Look at me,” I say, and her eyes slowly open. I want to watch her face the first time I touch her.
My open palm drops a heavy inch.Moisture and warmth coats the underside of my hand the second I touch her.
Her eyes widen, and not in a good way. The muscles at the top of her inner thighs tense against my hand.
“I’m sorry,” she says, squeezing her eyes shut. “I’m stupid, I’m sorry.”
“No, no, it’s okay.” I pull my hand away and surreptitiously wipe it on my jeans. She wouldn’t have seen me even if I’d waved it in the air in front of her, because now she has a forearm thrown over her eyes.
“Are you all right?” I tug at her fingers, making her arms flop down. Her eyes open, peering at me through copper lashes. In them I see embarrassment and frustration, but also relief.
“It’s just…” She tries to push herself up, and I moved aside quickly to give her space. I’d give her anything right now. She’s not the only one feeling embarrassed.Did I misread her signals? Was I pushing her to a place she didn’t want to go?The thoughts nearly crush me.
When Ember’s upright, she folds her legs beneath herself and bites at her bottom lip. Red blossoms onto her cheeks as she opens her mouth. “I’ve never done that before. I’ve never doneanythingbefore.”
Her words sink in. “So you’re a—”
“Yes,” she answers. “And obviously you’re not,” the words rush from her mouth, and when she realizes what she’s said, she slaps a hand over her lips. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.”
Then Ember does something I didn’t imagine my strong, fierce, and bold girlfriend could do. Tears dribble over the lower rims of her eyes and glide down her face. I pull her against me, and she cries softly against my chest.
I don’t tell her, but I’m crying on the inside too. I wish I were as inexperienced as she is. I wish I could give her my first time.
She lets me soothe her only for a minute. When she sits up, she wipes at her cheeks, and her eyes are bright and wide. “I thought I was ready. I’m kind of sick of being a virgin, you know?”
“Don’t worry. You’ll know when you’re ready.” A dark thought crosses my mind, and possession snakes through me, curling my insides. “I want to be your first, though, Ember.” The thought of someone else being inside her, earning a place in her memory as her first time, makes me see red. And I’m not a violent person.
Ember slices through my internal outrage with peals of laughter.
“What?”
“You,” she says, and offers no more.
“Me, what?”
“You’re being possessive. I kind of like it. Of course you’ll be my first, unless you’re planning to break up with me tomorrow. Then no deal.”
“Ember. Mine.” I pound my chest with a fist and growl the words. “Ember belong to Noah.”
I grunt, and she laughs again. I grunt two more times, she calls me a caveman, and I knock her back onto the bed. Through trial and error, I’ve learned the only place she’s ticklish are her thighs, so I squeeze the tops of them, making her howl with laughter. Between her loud laughter and my prehistoric grunting, we don’t hear anyone come home until the bedroom door flies open and her mom and sister are standing there, staring at us.
Ember laughs even harder at their faces, but I sober quickly, thinking of what they could have walked in on instead.
