Chapter Twenty Three
Carly
We’d been having such an amazing time. I’d told him more about myself than I’d told anyone in years. Then the server returned with his card and it all went to hell in a handbasket.
That name. I hadn’t heard it in nine years. Not since before Rico died. The pain that lanced through my heart wasn’t as sharp as it once was but it was still there. “You’re...Giovanni Marchetti.” It wasn’t a question.
“Si, Bella. What is wrong?”
My breathing became erratic, my heart rate soared, and for the second time in my life I began to hyperventilate.
“Breathe, Carly. Whatever it is, you need to calm down and take slow, deep breaths.”
If he was calling me by my first name I knew he was worried. It took several minutes for me to get my breathing under control. That was when I dropped my bombshell.
“Eli’s father was Enrico Marchetti.” I watched as Gio physically reacted to my words. “I can’t…I can’t do this. I need to go home. I can’t see you anymore, Gio.”
Oh fuck. How was I going to find another job that would pay me what I was making now at the club for the amount of hours I was there? There was no way that was going to happen, which meant back to working long hours. I was going to have to break my little boy’s heart. In that moment I hated Gio, just a little.
“Non, Bella. I’m not letting this go so easily. I’m not lettingyougo so easily.”
When he reached for me I jerked back. “You’re related to my son’s father. How am I supposed to just ignore that?”
“Si, he was my cousin. That is true. But why does that matter,Bella? Do you think Rico wold think ill of you for it? Do you think he would want you to be alone for the rest of your life?Tesoro, you were both so young. Don’t throw away a chance at happiness for a memory. Don’t throw your life away.”
I flinched at his words. They were blunt, perhaps a little harsh, but I knew in my head he was right. “I don’t know, Gio. I need time to think. Please take me home.”
He was silent so long I started to think he would refuse. “All right,Bella.”
“Thank you.”
Silence filled the car on the drive back to my apartment. When he came to a stop and started to get out I shook my head. “Please, Gio. Just...give me time.”
I was out of the car before he could stop me. By the time I reached my apartment door my vision was blurry from the tears clinging to my eyes.
“Carly? What’s wrong?”
I wanted to scream at the fates for their cruelty. “Gio is Rico’s cousin. His fuckingcousin. How am I supposed to be okay with dating my dead boyfriend’s cousin?” I stared at Risa, silently begging her to help me make sense of it all.
“Oh, sweetie. It’s not a bad thing. You always get a bit introspective on the anniversary of Rico’s death. At least with Gio you wouldn’t have to explain why. He would understand. What has you so freaked out, Carly?”
I sat on the sofa and buried my face in my hands. “I’m afraid I’ll be dishonoring his memory. I know it sounds crazy, or stupid, or whatever, but I’d believed Rico was it for me. I never expected to find someone else who could make me feel alive again and when I do, he just happens to be Rico’s cousin? What does that say about me?”
“Nothing. Absolutely nothing. You didn’t go out looking for someone related to him. Maybe this is Rico’s way of telling you it’s time to move on.”
My head came up and I stared at Risa. I had to admit what she was saying made sense. “You think so?”
“Yeah, I do. Fate can be really funny sometimes.”
“I don’t know how to do this, Risa. I don’t know how to let him in any more than I already have. It scares the shit out of me.”
“That’s when you know the feelings are real. If you weren’t scared I’d be a little worried about you. Answer me this. Can you see yourself walking away without giving this budding relationship a chance?”
I sat there thinking about her question. Could I just walk away? I’d been on exactly one date with Gio, but I saw him almost every day. The man got to me in ways I’d never expected anyone to. If I was completely honest with myself, what really scared me was just how strongly I felt for him already. I knew it would destroy me if I let him in and things didn’t work out. The question was, was it already too late? Was he already in too deep for me to get him out of my system?
“No. I can’t. And that scares me more than anything else. He has the ability to destroy me and he doesn’t even know it.”
“Then don’t walk away. Take it one day at a time, see where it goes, and just protect yourself as best you can. That’s all you can really do.”
“Thanks, Risa. You’re right. I know you’re right. I should let you get out of here. I know you have an early day tomorrow.”
“Don’t remind me. At least tomorrow is my final exam.”
“And then you’ll be a bona fide accountant. Your mama would be so proud of you if she was still here.”
“I’d like to think so. Anywho, goodnight, Carly.”
“Night, Risa.”
Once she was gone, I locked up he apartment, took a relaxing bath, and crawled into bed. I didn’t know what I was going to do about my growing feelings for Gio, but I was going to take Risa’s advice and take things one day at a time.
