Because at the end of the day I was doing all of this for one reason only. I was doing this for Aubrey. And for Landon. For a future I wanted to have with both of them. And one that I couldn’t have if I couldn’t stick this out and show them that I meant business. That when I hurt them, I was sorry.
So I’d stay. I’d try. I’d force myself to wake up in the morning and not think about how much I wanted to leave.
But I made a promise to myself. That after this was over, I would get out of here and I would get Aubrey back. I would show her that she didn’t need to run away from me. That I could take care of her. And take care of myself.
I felt a renewed conviction, and that felt good.
And as my heartbeat slowed and my breathing returned to normal, I began to think of other things besides all the ways I had messed up.
I started thinking of how to put the pieces back together.
The caged tiger of my addiction snarled angrily from where it lay trapped but noisy inside of me.
Aubrey.
Just her name quieted the voice in my head that wanted something altogether more damaging.
Aubrey.
The scary truth was that I couldn’t do this without her.
And I was determined that I wouldn’t have to.
chapter
four
aubrey
“ilove you so much, Aubrey,” Maxx murmured, his lips tracing a path from my temple down the side of my face. I could feel the imprint of his mouth on my skin. The slight tremble as he kissed a line along my jaw.
I took a deep breath,pulling the scent of him into my lungs. My eyes were closed. I couldn’t see him, but I really wanted to. I wanted to look into his blue eyes and see how much he wanted me. How much he loved me.
But I couldn’t open my eyes. I was trapped in a world of darkness.
“I’ve missed you so much,” Maxx whispered, his breath fanning across my face. His hands slipped up the front of my shirt, and I felt his confident fingers molding to my breasts. I relaxed into his familiar touch. I ached for him. Every cell, every nerve responded to only him.
I wanted to say his name. I wanted to tell him that I loved him. That I missed him. That I was miserable without him in my life.
But my mouth, like my eyes, seemed to be fused shut. I wasblind. I was mute. I could only feel as Maxx rubbed my nipples, a sharp bite as he pinched them almost viciously and then rubbed again gently, worshipfully. The soft pressure an unspoken apology.
“You’re mine, Aubrey. Always mine.” Maxx sounded so angry. Betrayal was thick in his voice as he pulled my shirt over my head and all but ripped my bra away from my hot skin.He sucked on my chest, and I felt a sharp prick of pain as I felt his teeth dig into my flesh.
Maxx was biting me! Hard!
I tried to lift my hands and push him away, but I couldn’t. Everything was dark. I couldn’t yell. I couldn’t move.
I could only feel as the man I loved pulled the skin from my bones with his teeth. The searing pain burned in my throat with my need to scream.
I felt Maxx’s tongue as he lapped the warm blood that flowed from the wound. And he wouldn’t stop. Not until he had consumed me completely.
He was devouring me. Eating me alive.
“You lied to me, Aubrey. You said you’d stay. You said you loved me. But you walked away. You left me all alone,” Maxx growled, his fingers piercing into my back, burrowing their way into my skin.
He was tearing me apart.
Literally.
