Is the quick cash really worth losing her?
I knew the answer immediately.
No.
But I didn’t know what else to do. Marco shook his head and picked up the two bags of drugs. “What are you doing?” I barked.
“Let me take these to the club with me. I’ve got to get over there and help set up.Ifyou come tonight, just find me and I’ll hand ’em over.” He stopped and looked down at the pills, an odd expression on his face.
“And if you don’t, I’ll give ’em back to Gash, no harm, no foul.”
“He’ll get pissed, Marco, you know that,” I argued.
Marco dropped the bags into his satchel and shrugged.
“I can deal with Gash.” He really was in a weird mood tonight.
For an instant I had the violent urge to tackle him and take the drugs back.They’re mine!the dark voice snarled inside of me.
But I forced myself to ignore the self-destructive whispers.
“Yeah. That’s cool,” I agreed.
Marco started heading to the door and then turned around to look at me again. “Dude, I really hope I don’t see you tonight.”
And then he was gone, the door closing behind him with a bang.
What the fuck?
I hadn’t expected Marco of all people to give me a way out. I just didn’t know if I really wanted to take it.
chapter
thirty-six
aubrey
ibroke several speed limits getting to Maxx’s apartment. My heart was beating angrily in my chest. I was feeling out of control as I pulled up across the street from the Quikki Mart.
I grabbed my purse and ran down the narrow alleyway. I took the steps two at a time, practically running over Maxx’s meth-head neighbor, who was going down as I was heading up.
“Whoa, lady, where’s the fire?” he asked, scratching at a sore on the side of his mouth. I didn’t bother to answer as I rushed past him.
My hands shook as I fumbled with my keys, finally locating the one I was looking for.
What did I hope to find by coming here?I asked myself as I made several unsuccessful attempts to unlock the door.
Proof that he lied? Proof that he was being honest? Confirmation that I wasn’t a total idiot for finally starting to trust him again?
I finally unlocked the door and went inside, noting that the place was dark and it was obvious he wasn’t home. I turned on the lights and stood in the middle of his living room, wondering what I should do next.
What was I even looking for? I didn’t honestly think that he’d leave a note saying “Out doing drugs, be back later.”
I marched purposefully back to his bedroom, throwing open the door with enough force that it bounced off the wall. I was raging on suspicion. These feelings were dangerous. I looked around, but nothing stood out.
I walked across the room and sat down on his bed, my heart in jagged pieces at my feet. I stared up at his painting of us, which now hung above his bed, wanting to trust that he wouldn’t throw away the possibility of that future.
Because Maxx loved me. I loved him. That should be enough for me to believe in him. But it was hard to overlook what I had seen and heard tonight: the painting for the club. April’s innocent admission that she had seen Maxx at the club. The growing concern over his attitude and unwillingness to tell me about his mysterious job.
